Acronym. Typical Enlisted Dude. A slang term used to classify the junior enlisted portion of the military. A total cliche. Probably only joined the military because they watch too many movies. TEDs can easily be identified by their motivated regulation haircuts, lack of fashion sense, dopey personality, mindless devotion to their particular branch of service, limited vocabulary, and arrogant sense of self worth. They usually serve a some small role in the military, which often involves carrying guns to work. Typical Officer Dudes are obviously TODs

1) Air Wing Marine: Man, what a rough week. We had to send 3 planes overseas.
Grunt: Stupid POG! Why not join the infantry like a real Marine!
Air Wing Marine: Because I got higher than a 30 on the ASVAB, TED

2) Marine 1: Dude, look at the high and tight on that tool.

Marine 2 Hey TED(yelling)!

Marine 1: holy shit he looked. What a tool.

TED by ThreeFiveTwo June 10, 2010

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Ted

A person who kills a joke by stating something obvious. Derivative of the scene from Family Guy where Ted Turner says 'Like a bisexual'.

Guy 1: And she called me Brendan!
Guy 2: Haha that's funny!
Guy 3: It's funny, because your name is Brian!
Guy 1 & 2: Thanks Ted.

Ted by TotallyAwesomeIndividual October 4, 2009

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Ted

extremely awesome, a really cool kid, is definetly not gay, probably has lots of friends, and all the chicks like him

Ted is really pimpalicious

Ted by ted the greatest February 21, 2009

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