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2
A self-loathing senator that wasn't even born in America, who killed 37 people in Northern California
Has fat nips
Looks like a dog that was just scolded

Dreams to escape the nightmare which is his life
Is that the zodiac killer?
Yeah, well its Ted Cruz but same thing.
by Ted Cruz Lover 69 November 01, 2017
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3
Man#1-Man ted Cruz is such a idiot why isn't he kicked out of the government ? Man#2-lol have you seen trump and spicer? Man#3-Man how this country has fallen.
by dvkjkfobnf May 08, 2017
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4
A poop that is way too slimy, and takes unreasonable amounts of toilet paper to wipe away, while never feeling completely cleaned.
"Why have you been in the bathroom for 6 hours"
"Oh, man I just took a huge Ted Cruz. I've been sitting there trying to wipe it away."
by racmETrIUsErANCrAltiC August 06, 2016
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6
Also known as "Lyin' Ted", "Ted Scruz", "El Rato Cruz", "Canadian Ted", "Rafael Cruz", "Zodiac Killer", "Booger-Eatin Ted", "cheaTED", "Rat", "Pandering Cruz", "Five-Mistress Ted".
Ted Cruz holds the Bible up high, puts it down, and then he lies!
by TheRealZodiac May 23, 2016
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7
"Who are you voting for in the 2016 election?"

"Probably Ted Cruz."

"Dude... That's the Zodiac Killer..."
by George Washingmachine July 25, 2016
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