The bizarre act seen in many porn films whereby a distinguished gentleman or gracious lady with strap-on, grips the base of the phallus and lightly taps it upon the meaty buttock-flesh of a partner presenting themselves by resting on the knees and hands (or elbows (...or face)). The most likely explanation for this phenomenon was offered by Professor Archibald Knobblyknackers of Christ College, Oxford, who theorised that the action was originally designed to test the hollowness of the awaiting bung-hole after the disastrous attempt by a disoriented Ron Jeremy to sodomise a helpless-yet-impenetrable Venus De Milo prop, which resulted in an imploded bellend and the brief resurrection of Michelangelo Batio for vengeance, who was given licence to murder twelve pigeons after a hazardous filing error and accidental double-lifing on account of the fact he wasn’t dead in the first place. Thus, dick tamping was subsequently invented as a safety precaution to ensure adequate space for a ram-passage, or to check for cockroaches or something.
‘Always precede any acts of quadrapedal intercourse with thorough dick tamping. If you are not sure whether it is safe to proceed, do not risk entry under any circumstances and contact your appointed fire official, where the offending buttocks will be taken away to be incinerated’ – the Porn Safety Handbook
by 535 October 9, 2012
Get the Dick Tamping mug.When a female is menstruating and being a bitch because of it, she is in a tamponic rage (Not to be confused with a female who is mad but not on account of PMS. That's just a rage.)
Girl: OMG I'm so sorry I was such a hoe last night. I'm in a bit of a tamponic rage.
OR
Boy: Sorry I couldn't go golfing yesterday. My wife took a spa day and left me with the kids.
Other Boy: Damn, bro. Sounds like someone was in a bit of a tamponic rage.
OR
Boy: Sorry I couldn't go golfing yesterday. My wife took a spa day and left me with the kids.
Other Boy: Damn, bro. Sounds like someone was in a bit of a tamponic rage.
by FothPhro August 16, 2009
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TAMPINI • tamping • Tamponing • taminie • Tampanian • tampicious • Tampin' • Tamini • Tampanian Whisper • Tampenis
A cute, somewhat smart female human, who likes anime and is afraid of her own humor. But she will never give you up, or let you down.
by ur_waifu May 26, 2020
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Johnny: Gyro, i dont even know how to do it but sure
Johnny: Gyro, i dont even know how to do it but sure
by 0LD0DDys April 5, 2021
Get the lesson 5 no kono tamini mug.all xiasuey yps inside this school, like to dye hair and put one leg sleeve tattoo, showing off said tattoo by wearing extremely short pants. likes to talk to more than one girl at once and think they are extremely cool
by YpTampinesGivenchy August 22, 2021
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Note: It is considered a deadly weapon in the court of law.
Word coined by Gino F.
Note: It is considered a deadly weapon in the court of law.
Word coined by Gino F.
by Onig July 7, 2009
Get the Tappini mug.A man who treats a girl like royalty and is constantly around her to the point of almost fusing with her vagina
by KakaRatchetCake March 10, 2017
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