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slackjack

duddee that chik rebecca is such a slackjackkk ! she doesnt do anythinggg !
by uhmmm_ idk? April 23, 2007
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Snackjack

Prone to occur in communal enviorments such as a joint kitchentte or a domestic refrigerator, the snackjack is no less than a crime against nature.
It can strike everywhere and anywhere and none is spared.
Put simply, to be robbed of one's snack.
"Hey, anyone seen my snickers?"
*Everyone goes Silent*
"Zounds! Snackjacked again."
by Beepus July 19, 2007
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swampjack

n. sweaty, disgusting masturbation. usually occurring immediately after exercising, working, or being outside in the heat. Becoming aroused due to being outside around bikini-clad women and having to relieve oneself immediately in the poolhouse bathroom.
After going for a three mile jog in mid-June, Stanley came back inside and did a swampjack.

Bill: Stan, what the hell are you doing on my laptop?
Stanley: A swampjack.
by ColombianSkyhawk July 9, 2011
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spunkjacked

From the verb "Spunkjack", meaning to take semen from a man against his will. Typically this will be done by a pre/early-thirties woman to her soon to be ex in order to secure a set of fertilised eggs for later implantation, although it could also have uses in framing someone for crimes with a sexual angle.

The origins of the term come from a discussion surrounding a recent case in ireland in which a man blocked his ex-wife's attempts to have eggs which he had fertilized implanted in order to bear children. His arguement was that half the genetic material was his. However, unless said material was taken by force, he must have willingly donated it, there by creating a 'gift' of his sperm. So it had to be true - he'd been spunkjacked, and finally he would have spunk justice.

Interestingly there is no antonym since you can't put it back in once it's out. To date, I am unaware of any cases in which anyone has tried to force one mans semen into anothers Japs eye but if it happens to you then please accept my sincere condolences.

Contrary to popular belief, Spunkjacking is not a victimless crime. At least 2 million of the little white soldiers stand to die in a failed hit. And most men do not appreciate getting a hand job if you don't wake them up when it's happening.

Luckily, you can help cut down on Spunkjacking in your area. When a woman gives you a mouth-based treat, make sure you donkey punch her so she is forced to swallow. Also, having a spare condom or even an empty crisp packet handy can be a life saver.
So she's all like, sucking my cock but I never checked that that bitch had swallowed, next thing I know I have a paternity suit on my hands. She's a god damned Spunkjacker!

But officer, I've never even seen this woman before. How could my semen be all over her face, hands and clothing? Dear God! I've been Spunkjacked!
by Nunberry September 6, 2008
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Spunkjack

Verb, meaning to take semen from a man against his will. Typically this will be done by a pre/early-thirties woman to her soon to be ex in order to secure a set of fertilised eggs for later implantation, although it could also have uses in framing someone for crimes with a sexual angle.

The origins of the term come from a discussion surrounding a recent case in ireland in which a man blocked his ex-wife's attempts to have eggs which he had fertilized implanted in order to bear children. His arguement was that half the genetic material was his. However, unless said material was taken by force, he must have willingly donated it, there by creating a 'gift' of his sperm. So for his case to hold water, only one thing could have happened - he'd been spunkjacked. (Had he won the case, he could have said to have had spunk justice)

Interestingly there is no antonym since you can't put it back in once it's out. To date, I am unaware of any cases in which anyone has tried to force one mans semen into anothers Japs eye but if it happens to you then please accept my sincere condolences.

Contrary to popular belief, Spunkjacking is not a victimless crime. At least 2 million of the little white soldiers stand to die in a failed hit. And most men do not appreciate getting a hand job if you don't wake them up when it's happening.

Luckily, you can help cut down on Spunkjacking in your area. When a woman gives you a mouth-based treat, make sure you donkey punch her so she is forced to swallow. Also, having a spare condom or even an empty crisp packet handy can be a life saver.
So she's all like, sucking my cock but I never checked that that bitch had swallowed, next thing I know I have a paternity suit on my hands. She's a god damned Spunkjacker!

But officer, I've never even seen this dead woman before. How could my semen be all over her face, hands and clothing? Dear God! I've been Spunkjacked!
by Nunberry July 16, 2006
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Scanjack

When someone masturbates while looking at body scanner porn. Popular in airport security rooms and illegal fetish lounges around the world.
"Dude, we were scanjacking so hard yesterday!" "My mom walked in on me scanjacking to some seriously hardcore scans" "Scanjacking makes me want to fuck a ghost" "let's go to the airport and scanjack
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swankcakes

A general term for something that is beyond awesome.
That guitar riff you were just playing was swankcakes, dude.
by Faddenator December 7, 2006
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