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spunkjacked

From the verb "Spunkjack", meaning to take semen from a man against his will. Typically this will be done by a pre/early-thirties woman to her soon to be ex in order to secure a set of fertilised eggs for later implantation, although it could also have uses in framing someone for crimes with a sexual angle.

The origins of the term come from a discussion surrounding a recent case in ireland in which a man blocked his ex-wife's attempts to have eggs which he had fertilized implanted in order to bear children. His arguement was that half the genetic material was his. However, unless said material was taken by force, he must have willingly donated it, there by creating a 'gift' of his sperm. So it had to be true - he'd been spunkjacked, and finally he would have spunk justice.

Interestingly there is no antonym since you can't put it back in once it's out. To date, I am unaware of any cases in which anyone has tried to force one mans semen into anothers Japs eye but if it happens to you then please accept my sincere condolences.

Contrary to popular belief, Spunkjacking is not a victimless crime. At least 2 million of the little white soldiers stand to die in a failed hit. And most men do not appreciate getting a hand job if you don't wake them up when it's happening.

Luckily, you can help cut down on Spunkjacking in your area. When a woman gives you a mouth-based treat, make sure you donkey punch her so she is forced to swallow. Also, having a spare condom or even an empty crisp packet handy can be a life saver.
So she's all like, sucking my cock but I never checked that that bitch had swallowed, next thing I know I have a paternity suit on my hands. She's a god damned Spunkjacker!

But officer, I've never even seen this woman before. How could my semen be all over her face, hands and clothing? Dear God! I've been Spunkjacked!
spunkjacked by Nunberry September 6, 2008
Words you can keep

spunkjockey 

a man who rides another mans cock for the purpose of pleasure and being filled with spunk
hey spunkjockey come and ride my cock...i'm gonna fill you with spunk !
spunkjockey by mike kershaw July 27, 2006
Related Words

Spunkjack 

Verb, meaning to take semen from a man against his will. Typically this will be done by a pre/early-thirties woman to her soon to be ex in order to secure a set of fertilised eggs for later implantation, although it could also have uses in framing someone for crimes with a sexual angle.

The origins of the term come from a discussion surrounding a recent case in ireland in which a man blocked his ex-wife's attempts to have eggs which he had fertilized implanted in order to bear children. His arguement was that half the genetic material was his. However, unless said material was taken by force, he must have willingly donated it, there by creating a 'gift' of his sperm. So for his case to hold water, only one thing could have happened - he'd been spunkjacked. (Had he won the case, he could have said to have had spunk justice)

Interestingly there is no antonym since you can't put it back in once it's out. To date, I am unaware of any cases in which anyone has tried to force one mans semen into anothers Japs eye but if it happens to you then please accept my sincere condolences.

Contrary to popular belief, Spunkjacking is not a victimless crime. At least 2 million of the little white soldiers stand to die in a failed hit. And most men do not appreciate getting a hand job if you don't wake them up when it's happening.

Luckily, you can help cut down on Spunkjacking in your area. When a woman gives you a mouth-based treat, make sure you donkey punch her so she is forced to swallow. Also, having a spare condom or even an empty crisp packet handy can be a life saver.
So she's all like, sucking my cock but I never checked that that bitch had swallowed, next thing I know I have a paternity suit on my hands. She's a god damned Spunkjacker!

But officer, I've never even seen this dead woman before. How could my semen be all over her face, hands and clothing? Dear God! I've been Spunkjacked!
Spunkjack by Nunberry July 16, 2006
More from Urban Dictionary

Salad Days 

green inexperienced youthful judgement and cold blooded execution of those judgements.

Rashness with little concern of consequence.

Antony and Cleopatra. William Shakespeare

"My salad days,
When I was green in judgment, cold in blood."

- William Shakespeare, Antony and Cleopatra, 1.5
"How did you end up in jail?"

"Salad days, 'nuf said."
Salad Days by GilbyRFC0 October 7, 2011
Word of the Day on August 28, 2026

age gate 

An absolutely foolproof way to keep minors from viewing content deemed "too mature" for them to watch.
Billy: "So I was trying to watch some videos for an M rated game, and I ran into an age gate, so I put in my real birthday. SOMEHOW it managed to figure out that I am 12. CURSE YOU AGE GATE!!!"

Bill: "Fucking age gate! *quick scroll* THERE! I was born on January 1, 1904. Fuck you age gate."
age gate by Banja January 7, 2011
Word of the Day on August 27, 2026

board chow 

A)
The Crud that collects under the keys in a keyboard. Usually more severe in the keyboards of programmers and webmasters as they tend to spend a lot of time at the the computer and thus eat at their desk. Mainly affecting IBM Model M (clicly) style boards.

B)
Can also be used to gross out Non-Techie people
A)
Bill: want to go to the club?
Bob: No, I've got to clean out my board chow, keys are starting to stick.

B)
Bill: Want to go out to get a bite?
Bob: No, i am just going to have some of my board chow/
Bill: Whats' that?
Bob: The food scraps that collect in my keyboard; Want some?
Bill: *GAG* *HURL* *GAG*
board chow by BinaryHackerMan September 3, 2007
Word of the Day on August 26, 2026

young pup 

a young person, a young adult in their late teens/early 20s.
Ah, you're just a young pup at 23!
young pup by the dog May 30, 2006
Word of the Day on August 25, 2026
West Midlands slang word for rockers, bikers, greasers etc. In the late 1980s it was used by the UK music press to refer to a specific scene centered around the bands Pop Will Eat Itself and Crazyhead. The term never found favour with readers of 'the inkies' (Sounds, Melody Maker and the still extant NME) and was soon dropped. Now often used in predominantly working-class areas of the midlands and the north to mean someone who listens to rock-derived music and/or dresses in a manner that suggests they affiliate themselves with rock music of some kind.
Some grebo passed with Sabbath playing on his stereo.
The Poppies are at no. 17? God, a grebo band in the charts!
They're playing nu-metal now, bloody grebos!
grebo by cactuscat September 15, 2006
Word of the Day on August 24, 2026

TikTok Farlands

TikTok Farlands is a term to refer to videos that you see after scrolling for a long time. These videos can potentially be disturbing, or weird. Said videos can also have low likes, or low comments.
“I reached the TikTok Farlands bro
Word of the Day on August 23, 2026
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