Merlin's pants

An exclamation of surprise or exasperation, used in the seventh Harry Potter book by Hermione. Alternatively "Merlin's most baggy Y fronts".

"Merlin's pants! This has to be the stupidest president ever."

by DragonflyHeather August 8, 2007

armchair mercenary

an individual, typically male, who incessantly second guesses the outcome of military battles recreated on television. Often addicted to the History Channel, has never served in the armed services, but is an active member of the NRA, an avid gun collector, yet doesn't hunt. Can be somewhat oblivious to spousal interests or needs.

Armchair mercenary: "Bla, bla, bla, then you know honey, if Brigadier General Warren's scouts hadn't found Little Round Top undefended, then Colonel Vincent wouldn't have led his brigade up the hill and set up a picket line. If General Lee's troops had just arrived there, say, just 10 minutes earlier, 20 tops, the Battle of Gettysburg would have been a Confederate victory! The rest would be history! Hey, grab me another beer, would ya?"
Wife: "You are sooo smart, snookums! You're my favorite armchair mercenary! Get your own beer, but just one! Remember? I've got to go, uh..... go and visit my sick friend again."
Armchair mercenary: "Hey, what if the Rebel snipers had had Barrett 50s with match ammo? Where'd I put the remote?

by Herr Doktor Grauwolf January 25, 2009

Marlene

A beautiful girl who loves to be around people she loves; easy to fall in love with and the nicest girl ever has a beautiful sexy body has brown eyes dark brown hair. Known for being thick and being a bad ass; she is funny, talented, laughs too much, lovable, crazy, and amazing does some bad choices but still an amazing person

Guy:Dude did you see that girl
Guy 2: Oh Marlene I heard she got high
Guy: Yes but damn she hella fine

by Noob2thicc April 19, 2019

Merle

A person who never give up and go on and on. Loyal and a true friend. Smiles every day, even when she isn't happy. Very selfcritical, but also very mad. Beautiful, but she don't realize. Listen to everybody

Merle, come over. I have to tell you something

by Joshuaa March 31, 2017

Melena

Melena is one of the most strong girls out there. Strong enough to battle even when times look like the worst in her life. She's very emotional but that is just her showing her compassion and care and that she has a kind heart. She is a very friendly person to be around and always makes a good first impression. She loves to have fun and party but knows her limits and what not to cross. She always feels the need to help her friends when they need her as well as her boyfriend. She has such a loving and supportive personality, a smile that lights up a room, and the ability to put you in a good mood no matter how bad you feel. She is a very lovable person and it's almost impossible not to fall in love with her and miss her. If you find yourself lucky enough to date a Melena,you make sure you treat her as best as you can as that's what she deserves and she would do the same for you. I love Melena.

Me: I can't imagine not being with you you're what I wanted
Melena: I know

by User1234567891011 April 20, 2020

Marlene

Not only the most pretty, lovely and caring girl, but also the best person you could have on your side for every crazy adventure or procrastination session. There is an ancient myth that Cupid, the handsome god of love, made his arrows while being inspired by the beauty and charm of Marlene. Naming a baby "Marlene" at birth guarantees the child a successful future.

Person1: "Damn, did you see that girl? She looked so lovely and had such a positive charm. What do you think was her name?"
Person2: "Marlene would be the only name possible"

by Spicy raccoon March 23, 2021

Velvet Merlin

A girl jerks you off while you wear a blanket as a wizard robe. She must use both hands as if grasping a hilt of a sword, pulling it from the stone. As you ejaculate, she points your dick at your own chin, giving you a drippy white beard.

I went to kiss my kids good night and forgot my wife gave me a Velvet Merlin.

by electrical discharge April 22, 2014