Masturfarting

Masturfarting, as opposed to its also popular brother activity, Farturbating, is when one engages in the act of masturbating while they pass gass. The order of these activities is crucial : If you are gassy (i.e. farting) and you elect to masturbate, you are masturfarting. Congratulations.

For disambiguation, see FARTURBATING, and the sister activity, QUEEFURBATING

Ron: "Why does it smell so weird in here?"

Dave: "Sorry, Ron, I was masturfarting. That should explain the smell, and the residue on your sheets."

by FarturBATing September 27, 2010

masturboarding

(verb) (1) The act of laying upside down in a shower or bathtub with your legs up the wall and drowning yourself while masturbating. (2) A form of sexual warfare whereupon the victim is both waterboarded and given a handjob.

See waterboarding

"John threw out his back last night while masturboarding himself"

by Masterboarder February 13, 2019

Masturbearding

Sensually stroking your beard

He was masturbearding in the library.

by Masterbearding April 26, 2015

Masturbirding

Birds outside a couple's house jerking off by watching and listening to them have sex.

Person 1: Those birds have been so noisy since we started boning!
Person 2: I think they're masturbirding...

by H4XOR13 March 26, 2023