(v.) The act of getting hoodwinked, completely screwed, or royally f**cked by an organization and/or person much like Coach Phil Jackson of the Los Angeles Lakers during the 2012/13 NBA basketball season.
Bill: I was up for that new promotion but was totally Jacksoned by the company for Larry.
Steve: Sorry to hear that Bill, you were the right man for the job!
Steve: Sorry to hear that Bill, you were the right man for the job!
by ITALUS November 13, 2012
Get the Jacksoned mug.1) - An act of utter self-serving meanness by someone purporting to be doing you a 'favour';
2) - Pertaining to:-
A lie of such staggering scope and proportion that the protagonist often begins to believe it themselves (see 'Munchausen Syndrome by proxy');
A continually-morphing tale involving bizarre range of actors, singers, musicians and scientists and the day he gave them career-assisting help/ advice from which the rest is history;
A state of delusion.
3) - An evening/ lifetime involving the heavy consumption of stella artois, weak spliffs and bags of ribs, punctuated by bouts of furious animalistic masterbation to Asian porn,
limp-dicked attempts to seduce anything with a pulse and no nose, and collapsing into an item of household furniture, followed by a morning of shoe-staring drunken regret;
4) - The mistaken belief that one is of a different ethnicity to one's own, following the slightest contact with a Reggae CD, and talking for the rest of the evening in a poorly-conceived Jamaican patois;
5) - Pertaining to the taking of an unwarranted 'commission' on goods or services (see Jackson Tax;
6) - A System of Education composing of 14 hours per day 365 days per year watching repeats of 'Top Gear' and The Discovery Channel, after which one attains such high states of knowledge and wisdom as to make Confucius piss the bed.
2) - Pertaining to:-
A lie of such staggering scope and proportion that the protagonist often begins to believe it themselves (see 'Munchausen Syndrome by proxy');
A continually-morphing tale involving bizarre range of actors, singers, musicians and scientists and the day he gave them career-assisting help/ advice from which the rest is history;
A state of delusion.
3) - An evening/ lifetime involving the heavy consumption of stella artois, weak spliffs and bags of ribs, punctuated by bouts of furious animalistic masterbation to Asian porn,
limp-dicked attempts to seduce anything with a pulse and no nose, and collapsing into an item of household furniture, followed by a morning of shoe-staring drunken regret;
4) - The mistaken belief that one is of a different ethnicity to one's own, following the slightest contact with a Reggae CD, and talking for the rest of the evening in a poorly-conceived Jamaican patois;
5) - Pertaining to the taking of an unwarranted 'commission' on goods or services (see Jackson Tax;
6) - A System of Education composing of 14 hours per day 365 days per year watching repeats of 'Top Gear' and The Discovery Channel, after which one attains such high states of knowledge and wisdom as to make Confucius piss the bed.
1) - "My friend, this bag of marijuana appears to be underweight, and the bag appears to have been somehow tampered with, yet you are insistant that I give you some in return for your efforts, and that I am being ungrateful. To me, this seems 'Jacksonesque' "
2) - "Steve, your story of how you bumped into Kurt Cobain at a Hole gig in 1992 in Newport, South Wales, spilling his pint in the process, having been bumped into by the Stereophonics on the dance floor and getting involved in a fight with them, seems to me to be rather 'Jacksonesque'".
3) - "He woke up face-down in a pool of his own sick, trousers concertina'd around mid-thigh, and hands sticky with the glutinous residue of Hoi-Sin sauce, and semen. He had had a Jacksonesque evening."
4) - "The Transformation is incredible. One minute he's Cornish-Scottish, but put on 'Natural Mystic' and he instantly takes on the spirit of a long-dead Rasta. He's like a shaman - it's almost Jacksonesque"
5) - "Has this been subject to Jackson Tax? I believe you are acting in a Jacksonesque manner."
6) - "He told me he has to keep his head down for a few days because there's a deal going down. He says he's been working for the Russians. the shit-puppet is jacksonesque. ".
2) - "Steve, your story of how you bumped into Kurt Cobain at a Hole gig in 1992 in Newport, South Wales, spilling his pint in the process, having been bumped into by the Stereophonics on the dance floor and getting involved in a fight with them, seems to me to be rather 'Jacksonesque'".
3) - "He woke up face-down in a pool of his own sick, trousers concertina'd around mid-thigh, and hands sticky with the glutinous residue of Hoi-Sin sauce, and semen. He had had a Jacksonesque evening."
4) - "The Transformation is incredible. One minute he's Cornish-Scottish, but put on 'Natural Mystic' and he instantly takes on the spirit of a long-dead Rasta. He's like a shaman - it's almost Jacksonesque"
5) - "Has this been subject to Jackson Tax? I believe you are acting in a Jacksonesque manner."
6) - "He told me he has to keep his head down for a few days because there's a deal going down. He says he's been working for the Russians. the shit-puppet is jacksonesque. ".
by bagofspanners November 9, 2009
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When you and a partner begin to engage in a sexual act, but when you want to go further, your partner rejects you. It is called "stonewall jacksoned" because your partner often has impenetrable defences.
Guy 1: Man I started messing areound with Nicole the other day but as soon as it started getting hot she Stonewall Jacksoned me!
Guy 2: How can something so evil possible exist...
Guy 2: How can something so evil possible exist...
by ginnihinh April 7, 2010
Get the stonewall jacksoned mug.When somebody one-ups you. Referring to when Michael Jackson died the same day as Farrah Fawcett and she was instantly forgotten as any kind of public figure.
Kelly gets a cold and the office sends her a card, but then Amanda gets swine flu and the county quarantees her. When Kelly gets to work she says, "Amanda totally Michael Jacksoned me".
by FarrahRIP June 27, 2009
Get the Michael Jacksoned mug.It goes with "doesn't know ..." You say it about somebody who doesn't know anything of any use at all, and when it is not enough to say "he doesn't know jack," and you are tired of "jack-shit."
The first four years of being an alderman, you don't know jack-bone! (Maze Jackson on his radio show)
by qariwa February 12, 2019
Get the jack-bone mug.by Mena84 September 5, 2019
Get the jacksoned mug.In reference to the popular Disney show, Jett Jackson starring Lee Thompson Young. It is when a man has a one night stand and on his way out leaves a note telling the slut that he has syphillis.
by Eric Von Detton May 13, 2005
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