Capitol Riots

on January 6 2021, Trump told his moron supporters to riot the capitol in an attempt to overturn the election
they broke windows and flew confederate flags (reminder:this is the "Party Of Lincoln")

there were officers trying to stop the morons but there were also officers that were morons
sadly 1 good officer was killed but there also were 4 maga moron deaths, one was shot , another tazed his balls for some reason, another was trampled and the last had a stroke

but more chaos came when dumbasses started sitting in the seats of members and the morons started stealing stuff
one even stole the podium but thankfully congress members managed to take the votes when they were leaving

so where were the Trumps?
they were furiously masturbating to the riots
after Biden gave a speech telling Trump to step up, Trump gave the most forced speech in history telling his morons to go home

after the riots, congress confirmed that Biden won, McConnell got replaced, Devos resigned, and Perdue lost
people started turning on Trump, hundreds of people from The Trump Administration resigned
Tucker Carlson stopped ass kissing and Pence announced Biden's Win

thankfully rioters got arrested
morons said that protests where peaceful and it's antifa disguised
but before fake news could spread Trump was terminated from Social Media
Trump stopped the election fraud shit before he got banned and finally conceded
he also said he wouldn't attend Biden's Inauguration but nobody gives a shit

Person: did you see the Capitol Riots
Dumbass: IT WAS ANTIFA IN DISGUISE
Person: atleast Trump conceded

by SmartEpic2020 January 8, 2021

Capitol Dog

A band in the midwest created by a musician from Seattle.

Hey, I went onto Garageband.com the other day and found a cool sounding band named Capitol Dog. Their music is diverse and rocks almost like alternative. Capitol Dog

by Quilly The Porcupine July 14, 2009

Capitol Hilldos

A portmanteau of Capitol Hill and Dildos, which stands as a derogatory name for the United States Senate and House of Representatives, because much like a sex toy, they rarely accomplish anything without being handled aggressively and serve only the purpose of fucking you.

Reporter on TV: and in other news, Congress has once again demonstrated what Capitol Hilldos they are by jamming $500 Billion of Corporate Bailout spending into the Coronavirus stimulus package, screwing our financial future but making sure their campaign donors won't have to sell off their yachts and summer homes...

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin March 29, 2020

Capitol Heights

Capitol Heights is a sprawling area where drug dealing and gun violence takes place nightly in Prince Georges County, Maryland. Criminals frequently commit armed carjackings and robberies in Capitol Heights, Maryland. Capitol Heights Crew is the primary gang in Capitol Heights. Gun battles frequently take place in Capitol Heights between the police and thugs. In September 2013, the Capitol Heights Metro Stop was determined to be the most violent metro station in Prince Georges County, Maryland. Large fights involving urban youth are common in Capitol Heights when school lets out and in the evening time. Capitol Heights is so violent that kids are shot walking to school. Nobody is safe in Capitol Heights. On the corner of Larchmont Ave and Emo Ave, someone wrote "Kill Whitey" on the side of the building. Capitol Heights is so corrupt, that the Hillside Firehouse located on Larchmont Ave was closed.

The homies in Capitol Heights got the choppa ready for tonight. They gonna do battle with the boyz from DC.

by DMV Crypt Keeper October 12, 2013

Capitol Hill

A very uncomfortable place to sit if one's name happens to be Bill.

Ty: What are you doing here?

Bill: Well, I'm just sitting here on Capitol Hill.

Ty: Loser.

Don't worry Bill, I'm rooting for you.

by Diggity Monkeez March 27, 2005

capitol punishment

The premature termination of life that Abraham Lincoln, James Garfield, William McKinley, and John F. Kennedy received as a "penalty for their crime" of merely being the current U.S. President.

My favorite "capitol punishment" joke is "So aside from the ending, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?"

by QuacksO September 23, 2020

Capitol Hill Day School

CHDS does absolutely nothing to prepare you for real life. It is basically a prep school for Sidwell and is home to 50% Taylor Swift stans and 70% assholes. The school is a wannabe progressive that fucks up a little too often.

Students are pretty nice and they have an impressively small amount of bullying. Stay clear of taking French and you'll be fine. Beautiful campus but you got to wonder what the fuck they are doing with all that money.

Warning: You may meet famous people's asshat children who will threaten to arrest you.

Typical conversation with a kid from Capitol Hill Day School:

CHDS kid 2: Dude, did you see the presidential debate last night?

St. Peter's kid: What about it?

CHDS kid 1: My mom was in it.

CHDS kid 2: My mom *was* the debate.

St. Peter's kid: WTF...

by ittybittytitties September 28, 2021