Douche Bag

Typically someone born after 1990. A person that can name every American Idol winner, but doesn't know who the Vice President of the United States is. Someone who is overly obsessed with reality shows. This person also has an affinity for bands like Nickleback, Three Days Grace, or Good Charlotte. A person who thinks that people actually give a fuck about their tweets. Someone who "likes" everyones feeds on Facebook. Rather than playing the field, male douche bags usually have to have a girlfriend to feel complete. Male douche bags typically have to be nice to a girl in order to fuck her because they aren't capable of sealing the deal otherwise. Someone who gets their ass whooped in a fair fight and tries to sue. Michael Moore. People who get offended over stupid shit. People who don't speak their mind because they are afraid that someone else will get offended. Attorneys.

Person 1: So what are you gonna do tonight?

Douche Bag: I'm probably going to stay at home. Jersey Shore is coming on tonight.

Person 1: Wow...you're such a Douche Bag.

by TheRealF'inDeal July 9, 2011

Moby Douche

A white guy who is such a huge douche he can sink an entire ship with his douchyness. By extension, his douchy capacities are so huge he can ruin virtually any occasion at which he is present.

Dude! Andy is such a Moby Douche even Ahab couldn't stop him.

by speedshift September 14, 2014

douche-canister

A person that is such a douche than they transcend being a douchebag and go right into the category of being an entire canister of douche material.

"Al's here? I can't stand that douche-canister!"

by Dave Losso December 12, 2007

douche-lord

The next step in the hierarchy of douche's. There is your regular douche-bag, then there is a souche-lord. Someone who goes above and beyond to be an ass

"I was thinking of giving him another chance when two girls said they hooked-up with him in one night."

"What a douche-lord"

by katwoman007 February 24, 2010

Subtle douche

An individual that bears the semblance of being a cool person, but this perception is merely a veil for their extensive douchiness. A subtle douche may take the shape of someone not generally perceived as a douche (i.e. a nerd), but may in fact use that sterotyping as leverage to assert their ill-conceived sense of self-worth. Subtle douches generally aren't as blatant in expressing their levels of douchiness, but are capable of putting forth equal to larger amounts as their more expressive cousins.

Person A: Something about his class, man, I just can't seem to get above a B on his essays.
Subtle Douche: Yeah, I don't know what is either, seems I'm always getting at least a 95%. I don't get it.

Person B: I'm doing my report on Edgar Allen Poe, how do you feel about him?
Subtle Douche: Well Poe was something of a tortured genius. Unfortunately, the way he was perceived by the public outweighs the sheer brilliance of his work. He reminds me of myself in that sense.

Person C: God, The Beatles are such a solid band. I love them so much.
Subtle Douche: Yeah, the Beatles are cool and all, but they're waaaaay mainstream. I like Mumford & Sons. They're way indie bro. Seriously, like no one knows who they are.
Person C: You're a fucking tool.

by D Stalt December 18, 2011

douche elephant

the beer guzzling, weight gaming homosexual. while elephants drink water through their noise this douch elephant would love to attempt to guzzle down beer through his noise often resulting in beer spilled all over themselves and a large mouthed smile.

wow. look at the douche elephant, he can't even handle one beer and he wants to try das boot.

by yourmom00 December 6, 2007

Vinegar Douche

(noun) A douche that uses vinegar to flush out a woman's vaginal cavity.

Helen, you should use a vinegar douche.

by Kyle Stienberg January 9, 2009