Yogurt musket

A device used to launch creamy baby yogurt to its intended location. Aka a mans dick, and/or crank.

Now that Rutz lives in Texas, he is free to fire his yogurt musket at Sean’s mom.

While frowned upon, Rutz can fire his yogurt musket off of his front porch now that he lives in Texas.

by Schmitty1127 July 2, 2021

The slippery Musketeers

A variation of the classic "slippery wizard" but this one requires 3 friends preferably people you know but if not a random can be substituted for a friend.

friend number 1 attracts female (this is usually best looking one out of group best chance of success dont worry everyone gets a turn) When back at hideout friend number 1 starts to stick the female with his pork "sword" and with a wip of his whip the woman is distracted as your friend takes over after swinging in and uses his sword once he has done same the last musketeer joins in , upon finishing the woman turns round to find out nothing because remeber you have a mask on!

Then you all make haste on the 86bus back home !

The slippery Musketeers :P

by Gazz445 September 2, 2010

Grab My Musket

A euphamism for male masturbation, i.e., apply lip gloss, bash the bishop, beat it, beat off, beat (one's) meat, beat the bishop, buck the slobbering donkey, choke the chicken, crack one off, date Mrs. Palmer, fap, five knuckle shuffle, flog (one's) log, have a date with Rosie Palmer and her five sisters, have a tug of war with Cyclops, have a wank, jack off, jerk it , jerk off, jerk (one's) gherkin, junior Olympic pole vaulting, paint the ceiling, play pocket pinball, polish (one's) knob, pound (one's) pud – pudwhack, pud wrestle, punch the clown, punch the munchkin, rough up the suspect, rub one off, rub one out, slap the salami, spank it, spank (one's) monkey, stroke the salami, wank off – wax the carrot – wax the dolphin, whack it, whack off.

Phrase coined on 10/26/2016 by ex-Congressman Joe Walsh @WalshFreedom.

"On November 9th if Trump loses I'm gonna Grab My Musket. You in?"

by metalmixtress October 26, 2016

The three musketeers

The best name for a friendship group of 3. Crackheads only.

Person1: Hey what do we name our groupchat ?
Person2: We need something to do with the number 3
Person: The three musketeers.

by whatareyouatoad? May 19, 2020

Loading the Musket

The act of female mastubation.

When the woman is finished she will squirt. This is also known as "The musket Shot"

Greg: damn I looked through Dave's moms window last night and she was Loading the Musket.

by TFAssassin November 25, 2020

Mississippi Muff Musket

When you stuff hard boiled eggs into a woman’s vagina and then fuck it to pack them in like a musket.

I gave Jennifer a Mississippi Muff Musket last night.

by 8ballsinurmouth September 14, 2023

Own a musket for home defense

A copypasta that stems from a 2014 discussion on '4chan.' It is about a man in presumably the 18th Century defending his home from 4 intruders.

'Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.'

by sushm_ September 16, 2023