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Johnson State College

Small college in the middle of no where .. aka Vermont. Population of students is small, about 2,000. Consists of stoners, skateboarders, snowboarders/skiers, drama/theater people and dancers .... and anime club.

Campus is beautiful in the summer and fall and if you like snow then this is the place for you. Snow hangs around till early to mid spring.

The food (called Shwag - Shit We All Get) is decent on some days, other days it'll cause you to shwoop (shwag poop). This is very common with incoming freshman who are not used to shwag's effects on the human stomach.

Classes are mostly laid back so after a day of 3 classes, one can usually do nothing for the rest of the day and smoke a bowl with your friendly neighborhood badger mascot.
by JohnnyPatches April 5, 2011
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Community College

Positive: The best move financially when getting a college degree. You can transfer somewhere else after your two years of CC and not be in nearly as much debt as some others.

Negative: An academic black hole. Regardless of how smart you are, or how much time you have, this school will suck in all but the very well disciplined. The environment is full of people ages 17-50 who fully intend to graduate but never actually do. This is referred to as BHA (also known as black hole aura). Even people who had good grades in high school who attend CC are likely to be sucked in and see a sudden drop in their GPA. The ease of the classes will also fool some into thinking college (and thus University) will be easy as well.

Warning: If you aren't VERY disciplined AND focused, don't go here. End of story.
by John Smith 5 March 29, 2010
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Massachusetts College of Pharmacy and Health Sciences

A school where there is zero freedom, for kids who want to go into the health profession, where AP score sheets get lost everyday (but it doesn't even matter because they don't accept AP credit). The actual size of the school is about the size of your house. At this wonderful institution there is no gym, no pool, no sports teams (except cheerleading), no bookstore, no cafeteria, and barely enough dorms for the freshman alone. That's why we mooch off of all the other schools around us.

The student body is 70% composed of GIRLS, and of the 30% of guys that go here, only a good third of them are cute... and that is why the girls have to march all the way to Wentworth to mooch off THEIR guys.

The school is very health conscious and so they make sure their students get 10000 shots before school starts, give out free flu vaccines occasionally for extra precaution, put weird things into our food so we "don't get food poisoning" and give out kleenex and hand sanitizer in their Welcome Back To School gift-bags! GO MCPHS!
Teacher: So where are going to college?
Kid: MCPHS
Teacher: What's that stand for?
Kid: *long sigh and deep breath* Massachusetts College of Pharmacy and Health Sciences!
Teacher: Oh.. that sounds nice..
by Mandarthum September 2, 2009
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Gangster College

Another term for prison. Prison is called this as many people who find them selves in prison only learn the newest tricks of the trade and how to keep it more real instead of being rehibilitated or learning the error of their ways.
Carlos did a B & E now hes off to Gangster College for 4 years.

Don't you worry man you get me $500 dollars to start out and ill turn it into $50,000. I got my masters at Rikers Gangster College.
by The Screw of Damnation January 13, 2006
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College

An institute of learning, designed to serve as a hindrance to one's higher education. To this day I maintain that the smartest thing I ever did in college, was drop out.
The experience of a former student of DePaul University.
by nethcev! June 27, 2004
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College Confidential

A "college help forum" that breeds elite nerd factions. Everyone wants to know their "chances" of getting into a certain Ivy school, but everyone knows that if you don't have an inspiring life story you can't get in in the first place.
Another day at College Confidential...
Thread title: Chances

iluvphysics: Hey everyone, I want to know my chances of getting into the University of Chicago. Someone please tell me if these are remotely good enough?

Caucasian male, 5.1 GPA Freshman year
5.2 GPA Sophomore year
5.5 GPA Junior year
(weighted with extra summer classes)
2400 on the SAT, 36 on the ACT (re-took them 6 times)
President of Debate Club, French NHS, Science NHS, National Honor Society, Class Vice President, Treasurer for Spanish NHS, Art NHS,
Member of almost every club at school
Did Basketball, Tennis, and Track all four years, winning excessive awards and breaking more records than I have fingers,
Worked 3 jobs and was promoted my Senior year to leadership positions in all of them,
Recieved the Governor's Teen Award
Mayor's Top 10 award
National Merit Scholar
And numerous other academic awards,
Did 5000+ hours of community service,
Won the National Physics Bowl championship 4 years in a row

So will somebody PLEASE tell me if I have the FAINTEST chance of MAYBE getting in?

gradezarecool: I think you have a very strong chance of getting in, just like me.
mathdude101: And me!
SocratesSquared: Me, too. We'll all get in.

Thread title: Chances
chucknorris51: Hey guys, I want to get into the University of Chicago. Can someone help me out?
White dude from Colorado,
3.85 GPA Freshman year
3.65 GPA Sophomore year
4.06 GPA Junior year
(all weighted)
Did 70 hours of community service
Played tennis on JV for 3 years
Member of Gaming Club, French NHS, Science NHS
Got a 30 on my ACT
Worked a paper route for 4 years

Thanks
gradezarecool: YOU HAVE NO AWARDS?? No chance of getting in. You need at least a 36 on the ACT to even qualify.
mathdude101: OMG, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Not a chance. How could you even think of qualifying?
SocratesSquared: Wow, you're really stupid.
chucknorris51: Well, I did survive arm cancer when I was 4 years old and have been recovering all my life, even learning to play the guitar and tennis. What sets you guys apart?
gradezarecool: My extracurriculars.
mathdude101: My extracurriculars.
SocratesSquared: My extracurriculars.
chucknorris51: I see. So you really think I have no chance?
gradezarecool: NO CHANCE!!
mathdude101: NO WAY!!
SocratesSquared: I HAVE A TINY PENIS!! I mean, NO WAY!!
chucknorris51: Hah. Retards.
by SPDR January 5, 2009
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there's always barber college

a smart ass statement that lets the recipient know that you do not give a shit about their future. They do not have the right temperment for the trade, and you have made the decision to terminate them.
Morgan, you're out of here. What the fuck are you talkin about? You don't have the right temperment for the trade. What the fuck am I supposed to do? Theres always barber college.
by captain poopypants November 19, 2004
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