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Beat around the bush

When you have such copious amounts of pubic hair, that you have to reach around your bush to pull your monkey, causing an inconvenient delay.
Big Easy: Yo bro, my wife won’t let me smash so I’ve had to tug on my rope lately. It’s also no shave November, so I’ve had to beat around the bush.

Tyrant: When you say beating around the bush, you mean like delaying the shaving of your man shrubs?

Big Easy: No I literally have to beat around my bush. I got more hair down there than Rapunzel.

Tyrant: Sounds like a hairy situation.
by Stoney69 November 30, 2019
mugGet the Beat around the bushmug.

beat your dudley

I was beatin my dudley last night while i was thinking of your mom.
by Russell Collins June 22, 2005
mugGet the beat your dudleymug.

Beating James Spader

When you quickly masterbate, trying to finish in a short amount of time. Quickly trying to squeeze one out at work without anyone knowing.

In the movie 'The Secretary' James Spader ferociously beats off behind his secretary as one of his clients, who has an appointment, waits to see him.
I'm skipping lunch and "Beating James Spader". To hell with the meeting I'm "Beating James Spader" today.
by FelixM13 September 9, 2009
mugGet the Beating James Spadermug.

Phat Fucking Beats

Beats the happen to be phat and fucking at the same time.
Pump up those phat fucking beats At0m.
by Asdf November 29, 2003
mugGet the Phat Fucking Beatsmug.

Beating One Out

To masturbate aggressively, usually with a penis.

Synonyms:
Beat One Out
Beat the Meat
Beat It (yes Michael Jackson wrote a song about masturbating)
Beating the Sausage
Going to Causeway
PublicSafety: Open up! There's been a noise complaint.

Dug: Sorry officers, I was just Beating One Out.

PublicSafety: Carry on.
by definitelynottheghostofmichael October 28, 2018
mugGet the Beating One Outmug.

Meat Beat Mania

An endless gauntlet of meat beating. Nut after nut after nut. Consists of only one person. Any more parties involved turns this into a Nut Bust Bonanza.
1. After discovering internet porn, Ronnie decided it was time for a good 'ol Meat Beat Mania session.
2. "Damn, did you see how fine Catherine looked?" "Yeah, when I get home, I'm gonna play some Meat Beat Mania!"
by Riven Main 420 June 24, 2017
mugGet the Meat Beat Maniamug.

dead beat dad

Someone who does not pay child support, hasn't had a steady paycheck in at least a year, has a hooker of a girlfriend who has slept with at least two of his best friends, still lives with mommy and daddy and parties with people way too young for him because he doesn't know what priorities or responsibilities of a father should be.
"Wow, people really are oblivious to the difference between a playmate and a responsible father, huh?"

"Yeah, they don't see he is such a dead beat dad!"

See also buddy, playmate.

Antonyms- the gorgeous single guy across from your office, who is financial stable, has a successful job and wants to take you AND your daughter out.
by JONNYBEGOOD7583 June 29, 2010
mugGet the dead beat dadmug.

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