Two-Match Sweater

A humorous way of describing a really rough pooping incident. Most commonly used when one is A) severely constipated OR B) has explosive diarrhea. The meaning of the term comes from the need to light not one, but two matches (to cover the stench), and the fact that you broke out into a huge sweat, sometimes requiring the need to disrobe during the act of crapping.

Wow... That dump was a rough one... It ended up being a Two-Match Sweater!!

by Giuseppi Lucchesi June 20, 2009

One-two punch

When you bring a girl home and (1) lose your erection, then (2) ejaculate prematurely

"I got pretty drunk, then took her home and gave her the ol' one-two punch"

by Madison Square Gardens February 24, 2010

two exits, no waiting

Simultaneous explosion from opposite ends of the body, usually the result of a huge night on the booze or some sort of virus. One cannot be put off in favour of the other, requiring the immediate choice of the options below

Two exits, no waiting: do I puke in the bowl and shit on the floor or shit in the bowl and puke on the floor?

by Choda Boy 57 July 30, 2006

two-faced individual

Two Faced" is 'someone who tells one group of people or an individual one thing and another group of people or an individual another thing.' You can refer to a cheater as two-faced. This is because the cheater shows one face to you-- the sweet trusting face. But there is another face you don't see-- the lying, sneaky face.

A two-faced individual: Jeff is a two-faced liar! I hate him! He told me he loved me, and then he told all his friends that I was a loser.

by Aamilah December 15, 2014

Tijuana Two-Lip

The female counterpart to the Texas Belt Buckle. When a lady flashes a front wedgie and both lips pop out the sides. Can also be spelled like the flower, tulip.

Dude you won’t believe it, I was walking around with a Texas Belt Buckle and this chick came by and flashed a Tijuana Two-Lip. I’d never seen anything like it!

by A_Joy96 April 13, 2021

The Two Song Rule

Generally applied at parties to prevent guests from putting on a shit album and everyone having to listen to it in its entirety. Anyone may put songs on and after two songs anyone may change the music. The Credence Clearwater Revival rule is the only exemption to the two song rule. Once a CCR album is started it must be listened to until it is finished or until the person who put it on wants to change it.

Guest 1: "I'm going to put some music on"
Guest 2: "yeah well don't put shit on, and if you do the two song rule applies"

Guest 1: "Hey I'm sick of this CCR I'm putting something else on"
Guest 2: "Like fuck you are, CCR rule applies"

by JackTwo May 31, 2010

two kings and a queen

a common nickname for the Miami Heat's big three. In reference to the highly acclaimed skills of King James and his fellow initial King-in-residence D-Wade. The queen refers to their submissive counterpart who married into extensive fame and subsequent acclaim.

Hey did you guys see the two kings and a queen shut down the magic for one half and then get pummelled for the rest of the game?

by The_real_Stefan_Blueberry March 18, 2011