Upper Saddle River

This is one of the richest towns in one of the richest counties in America. It is home to mostly "new money" people. The old money is hard to come by, but it's easy to tell. Kids from old money parents will never brag about anything. There are probably about 10 of them in the entire town. The rest are all slutty japs with big tits, but most of them are silicone. But don't squeeze them or she'll have daddy sue you for all you've got, and then buy her a new nose with it. All the girls here have at least one coach, gucci, db, or prada bag for every day of the week. guys, your favorite store should be j crew and if you don't own at least ten things that say northface on it, you will never get a girl. if your family doesn't have more cars than drivers, a pool, an in home movie theater, or at least 3 other properties across the world, you're POOR. GET OUT before everyone finds out and talks shit about you, but they probably do anyway. This town is full of daddies who work in NYC "the city" and mommies who stay at home buying manolo shoes for their bitchy daughters all day. It breeds some of the smartest kids in the state even though they just text each other on their new razr cell phones during class all day. This town makes the Northern Highlands parking lot glitter, where the students have better cars than the teachers. If daddy didn't buy you a lexus, bmw, or audi, he probably doesn't love you. Take all the money in your trust fund and buy a new daddy! Unless of course he pimped out some other ride for you like a land rover, high end jeep, or hummer equipped with gps and chrome all over the place. If you crash your car, you'll probably get a more expensive one tomorrow. When you meet someone from this town, they will immediately tell you how great they are because they have sooo much stuff and their parents are sooo rich. If they don't brag to you about everything in the first 10 seconds, they are probably old money and actually have some class, that's a package deal right there. This town is full of jappy bitches and wiggas. What a great place to live!

Cop: You were going 50mph over the speed limit, that's a $300 fine

USR kid: UGHHH!! WHAAAAT! ummm well it's ok, i'm from Upper Saddle River, wait can daddy put that on his amex?

by Happy Highlander January 3, 2007

Saddle

A euphemistic metaphor for a woman's vaginal area when she is on her back and her thighs are spread (in ready-to-fuck position) to form a shape resembling the curvature of the surface of an equestrian saddle.

I was on the outs with my girlfriend for a while, but now I'm back in the saddle again.

A good example in music is the sexy 1980's country music hit by Mel Tillis, "I Got the Horse (i.e. penis) and She Got the Saddle (i.e. pussy)", with the chorus line, "together we're gonna ride, ride, ride!"

Another: In the movie Semi-Tough, when Kris Kristofferson finally gets the woman he loves, Jill Clayburgh, back in bed and is ready to fuck her (you can see his big hard-on poking up the sheets) the background music starts playing Gene Autrey's 1940's cowboy song, "I'm Back in the Saddle Again", as the scene fades.

by Bubbuh Two December 26, 2009

saddle grease

The visible stain on the outer garment of a person that "shart" themselves.

Did you see the stain on the back of that girls skirt? Yeah, she is sportin some saddle grease.

by Tacettes 2013 September 23, 2013

cock swaddle

The act of wrapping up your pud during masturbation with any sort of cloth or fabric (preferably soft and disposable) so that the inevitable sticky, messy load is confined and easily disposed of.

I know that Donnie employed the cock swaddle in my bathroom because he came out smiling, the bathroom didn't stink like ass, and one of my hand towels was missing. What a fucker.

by Cosmosis September 22, 2009

Rusty Saddles

A sexual position similar to the Rusty Trombone except one or both participants are dressed up as cowboys or cowgirls (mix and match except able). Often a favorite with those who tool leather for a profession and those who enjoy cowboy shooting (people who dress up like cowboys and shoot guns of that era)
and they seem to all have an unhealthy apatite for fast food.
Ironically the founder of Rusty Saddles was a professional leatherman and loved to cowboy shoot.

"yo Matt loves givin Rusty Saddles to cow hos.", "gitty up lil dowgies"

by ultrauseless December 31, 2007

The Grumpy Saddle

The which entitles clicking your ankle and or cankle to the back of your leg nonstop while playing Paddy-Cake with a friend. (A very hard dance to perfect.)

"Make room on the dance floor!" "That couple is about to do the grumpy saddle!

by Koch Master June 22, 2009

saddle bags

Disproportionately wide hips on a women who otherwise could be considered attractive.

She's an attractive lady even if she is packing saddle bags.

by Roland819 December 16, 2006