secret police

(n.) In dictatorial countries, secret police were used to maintain order and arrest political opponents. They were given all power to be brutal and kill anyone who disobeyed them.

The secret police are after you, turk.

by Kung-Fu Jesus May 7, 2004

secret eating

When you hide marshmellows in the pocket of your pants for eating between meals.

Hide them in your pockets for SECRET EATING!

by Bastardized Bottomburp September 11, 2003

Secretariat

When engaging in coitus with rear entry (doggie style) one hooks his ring and middle finger into the female's mouth bilaterally to provide leverage and minimize the talking. Thus mimicking riding a race horse.

She was all sweaty and kept talking so I pulled a Secretariat and finished up quick.

by Freeloading Rusty February 22, 2011

Secreslut

A woman or man who is both a secretary and a slut. One who enjoys fornicating in or outside the office with fellow co-workers, especially the boss. Secresluts are very crafty and clever and extreme caution should be used around them.

That new intern Sandy is definitely a secreslut, I heard she has had sex with four men in this office and she has only been working here for two weeks.

by DBallz November 3, 2012

secret lecture crush

A secret crush that develops in a lecture class with over 400 people.

boy: "yo, there's this fine, sexy, smart stranger in my communication lecture."
boy's friend: "have you ever talked to her."
boy: "no dude, theres like 1000 people in my class. I have made some pretty intense eye contact with her, though."
boy's friend: "man, you've got a Secret Lecture Crush."

by foxychik572 March 22, 2013

Secret Grape

This occurs when, during a normal fart in the standing position, a small grape-sized poop is rapidly ejected from the anal passage. This "secret grape" is undetectable, until one sits down, at which point, the grape is no longer secret.

John and Keith are walking down the road, Keith lets rip, the two friends chuckle. Later, they come to a bench, the two friends sit. Keith's face turns red and an ominous odour fills John's nostrils. The secret grape is no longer secret.

John - What's that smell Keith? and why's your face so red?

Keith - *stands up, squashed grape falls from trouser leg*

by Crabbinator March 26, 2013

secret puke

The act of excusing yourself from a party and puking in secrecy, then returning to the party scene as if you didn't puke and raging per usual. The act of puking is then revealed the next day.

Last night at the party, she had a secret puke and then chugged an IPA.

by Khuntrina May 5, 2013