Baking a turd

When you have to poop but decide to hold it in for awhile to get the most out of it when you shit.

Bro, do you wanna stop to go take a shit?

No. Im baking a turd right now.

by Summer coldness May 25, 2019

turd shredder

A turd cutter that has been afflicted with hemorrhoids to such a degree in which solid stool is passed with grooves or tracks carved into the surface by said hemorrhoids, similar to the process of a Play-Doh shape extruder toy.

I told Carroll to eat more fiber, otherwise she's going to end up with a turd shredder .

by molokaicoconut February 28, 2019

plug turd

The often disregarded fecal matter that morphs from a once gelatinous substance to a hard, concrete like formation that stops previously liquidized fecal excrement in it's tracks, whereas no further deposition of excremental matter may occur henceforth. (See "poop plug.")

Dangit Johnny! If you don't hurry up I'll surely soil myself! My plug turd is nearing it's expulsion!

by Illicitrampage August 1, 2019

Turd burglar

A person of ill repute who, upon acquiring a precious item not their own, then lays a fresh pile of defecant in its place.

"Brenda, the turd burglar's back. He left a present for you on aisle three."

by Strangeflavoredquark August 3, 2019

Turd Slide

An alternate name for a sewer.

After installing the new sewer, Tommy the Plumber took a step back and said, “Does that new turd slide look good to you?”

The plumber just fixed the turd slide, it’s safe to flush again.

by BigGuysWife November 13, 2018

Turd Burglar

What you call a person who robs homeless people

"Did you see that nob end who just stole that street musicians coin jar? What a major turd burglar."

by yeuo0oy October 16, 2018

Turd of Mouth

Australian comedy Podcast reviewing shit reviews. Totes meta. Top 10 in comedy charts on iTunes. Fookin hilarious.

Hey douchebag, you heard any good new funny podcasts recently?

Yeah mate, fuckin Turd of Mouth ey.

by Sum Yun Guy III November 5, 2018