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Eating Mashed Potatoes

Clean way of saying "masturbating and watching porn." The tense of "eating" can change depending on context.
Since I wasn't invited to any parties Friday night, I ended up staying home eating mashed potatoes.
by Licensed_Nerd January 12, 2022
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the mashed potato

When you're unaware of your pregnancy and you still have sex.
"What the hell? I don't what happened to Jimmy, but he be looking like he got the mashed potato. Not sure what happened to him, but when he came out, he came out in pieces."
by TheSpizzleWizard December 6, 2021
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Mashed potatoes

mashed potatoes are just Irish guacamole.
Hey Bro, did you know that mashed potatoes are just Irish guacamole.
Bro, what the fuck
by concon15 October 28, 2021
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Mashing Potatoes

When your having sex with a girl and she squirts on your face then you throw up.
I was mashing potatoes last night then had to take a shower to wash the filth off .
by Doofenshmirtz1218 December 21, 2024
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Adding Flour to a Liquid Mashed Potato

There things never do and adding flour to a liquid mashed potato is one of them.

-Gordon Ramsay 2011
by Ahadi2011 July 4, 2025
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mashed potatoes

mashed potatoes (slang, political) — A self-inflicted humiliation, especially one involving Donald Trump, where he provokes or instigates a situation that backfires spectacularly, leaving him publicly embarrassed but unwilling to admit fault or laugh at himself. Originates from a childhood story in which Trump, after teasing his younger brother, had a bowl of mashed potatoes dumped on his head by his older brother, an incident that reportedly left a lasting mark on his pride.
When Trump stumbled and couldn’t correctly explain the Constitution during the interview, commentators called it pure mashed potatoes—a humiliation entirely of his own making.
by SWEPro August 13, 2025
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Mashed Potatoes

To cut off your ball sack and testicles, mash them into a pulp and feed it to your sexual partner or eat it yourself.
"Did you hear that Jane ate her boyfriend's Mashed Potatoes?" "Yeah, I heard it was delicious"
by WeirdSexualStimulation September 17, 2025
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