by parallelpseudonym March 21, 2025

Kevlar Vest is a term describing a conspiracy theory that is more fact than fiction, the antithesis to a Tinfoil Hat conspiracy theory which is more fiction then fact. Typically investigating a Kevlar Vest conspiracy theory is bad for one’s health, thus you would require a “Kevlar Vest”.
Paul: “All I’m saying is that Epstein didn’t kill himself!”
Sally: *Rips off face, revealing herself to be an FBI agent.*
FBI Agent: “You should have stopped digging.”
Paul: “Aww man, I knew this was a Kevlar Vest Conspiracy.”
FBI Agent: *Kills Paul, frames it as a suicide.*
Sally: *Rips off face, revealing herself to be an FBI agent.*
FBI Agent: “You should have stopped digging.”
Paul: “Aww man, I knew this was a Kevlar Vest Conspiracy.”
FBI Agent: *Kills Paul, frames it as a suicide.*
by chinsaw2727 September 29, 2022

(Noun, Related; see "Battle Jacket")
A denim vest, particularly one worn by fans of metal music (colloquially refered to as "metalheads").
The distinction between a battle vest and a regular denim vest is that a battle vest will have patches sewn on indicating which bands the metalhead enjoys listening to. A battle vest may also include studs and/or spikes, however this is not a requirement to be deemed a "battle vest".
Many metal fans will wear these as a sign of dedication to their favorite bands, and as a calling card to fellow metalheads in public spaces; most notably, concerts and festivals. However, you may occasionally find a metalhead in the wild wearing their vest for common daytime activities, such as grocery shopping, or mowing their lawn.
While the vest may make someone appear intimidating, it should be noted that most metalheads are very sociable and amicable people, who simply want to use extreme fashion as a form of self-expression. In addition, most metalheads appreciate other genres of music as well, so don't be surprised if you hear them talking about their favorite rappers or jazz artists too!
A denim vest, particularly one worn by fans of metal music (colloquially refered to as "metalheads").
The distinction between a battle vest and a regular denim vest is that a battle vest will have patches sewn on indicating which bands the metalhead enjoys listening to. A battle vest may also include studs and/or spikes, however this is not a requirement to be deemed a "battle vest".
Many metal fans will wear these as a sign of dedication to their favorite bands, and as a calling card to fellow metalheads in public spaces; most notably, concerts and festivals. However, you may occasionally find a metalhead in the wild wearing their vest for common daytime activities, such as grocery shopping, or mowing their lawn.
While the vest may make someone appear intimidating, it should be noted that most metalheads are very sociable and amicable people, who simply want to use extreme fashion as a form of self-expression. In addition, most metalheads appreciate other genres of music as well, so don't be surprised if you hear them talking about their favorite rappers or jazz artists too!
"Whoa, did you check out that dude's battle vest?"
"Yeah man, He's got Gojira and Opeth patches sewn on there. He has some damn good taste!"
"Yeah man, He's got Gojira and Opeth patches sewn on there. He has some damn good taste!"
by Ceaig69420 August 8, 2024

by Alex Vixen June 17, 2016

by snoddydoesntknow May 8, 2016

by Danny Howell December 19, 2020
