give birth to a politician

to have a bowel movement, to defecate

I'll be right back I have to give birth to a politician.

by The Return of Light Joker December 9, 2009

Irritable Politician Syndrome

This is when you just want to live your life, but your politicians keep getting upset and making your life a living hell. This condition is similar to Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Like Bowels, politicians always have shit coming out of their mouths. Substitute 'politician' for 'bowel' and you get IPS.

Worker #1:"I'm glad election year is passed. My IPS was about to drive me insane."

Worker #2:"Oh, yeah? You got Irritable Bowel Syndrome?"

Worker #1:"No. Irritable Politician Syndrome. Same symptoms, different assholes."

by IndependentForever November 3, 2009

Politician

A type of liar. Full of promises that they don't often deliver on.

The politician said when elected that there would not be any capital gains tax implemented during the current term. Six months later then announces that a capital gains tax is to be bought in.

by Keeping It Smooth And Flexible May 10, 2021

Politician's thumb

The way a politician holds their hand in a first with their thumb used as the pointer, because focus groups said that using a finger was too aggressive.

Originally pioneered by Barack Obama, and used by most politicians since then who don't want to be seen as overly aggressive.

Did you see the rendition of Nikki Haley in the SNL episode of the Republican presidential candidates debate? She nailed the politician's thumb.

by Werdenschmidt November 13, 2023

Politician

Parasite

There’’s still house full of politicians at parliament. Well serves you right for not calling “Rentokil” to clear out those parasites.

by 1BigEck January 10, 2024

Politicians

You have staff, right? You have staff... who manage your affairs, your campaign, day-to-day activities, etc... Right? Sooo.... How are you not a retard who won a popularity contest? You sound like a retard. That’s what retards have. That’s what a retards life is like.... a waitress can do your job.... because your job is basically showing up where you’re told to show up... your job requirements are basically.... being able to read and write? And I need to work harder... to generate more money... for you... so you can work less.... I mean... you sit in a chair.... 80% of you are geriatric.... I should work harder though... that’s what should happen... so you can make more money... and you could say “But if you work harder you’ll make more money too” but... only one of us is doing the work... and I can turn on Cspan... and I can read the bills... and then (at that point) I’m basically doing your job... but for free... but I should work harder... so a literal retard can stop working in a last ditch effort to sponge up as much money as possible before they die... and who gets their money when they die (the money they took from everyone)... and who gets the money when they die? Fuck trophies... but it’s ok... generational wealth only lasts 3 generations... because the people at the top change.... because sometimes rich people only have daughters... and all of the names change... And that means I should work harder? Huh..... Ok.....

Hym “Sooo.... Politicians.... you said all of that.... and what I hear is that this is basically group-home world.... I hate to break it to you but Orwell is already here. I mean... I’m being punished for wrong-think... actively. People have deluded themselves into believing it’s necessary to engage in a selective surveillance state campaign... Oh wait.... ✌️✊✌️No one can hear me✌️✊✌️ (except for the people who read it every day and reference it every day and the guy who un-ironically said this to me as though he didn’t read it and isn’t responding to it actively). Oh well 🤷 ♂️ I’ll just keep talking.“

by Hym Iam November 1, 2022

politicians smile

A smile that everyone will fall in love with.

Her baby has a politicians smile.

by Latbirch June 12, 2020