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Scottish Rug Burn

What results after a desparate hiker gets lost in the woods and has to take the biggest, most explosive dump of his or her life. This sorry hiker then frantically searches for something which can be used as toilet paper, finding a three-leaved plant. This plant turns out to be poison ivy, and the intense rubbing action results in a horribly painful and itchy rash surrounding the hiker's butt-crack. Can last for up to several weeks and often gets inflamed if the hiker has a bad case of the hershey squirts.
Hot dang my butthole feels like it's about to spontaneously combust after I used that weird plant for toilet paper while camping last week. I'm not joking I mean I'm pretty sure this feels worse than that bad case of herpes that keeps coming back. I think I have the world's worst Scottish Rug Burn.
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scottish football 

the most entertaining , exciting and competitive league in football
scottish football by yolomateymoo February 16, 2013

Scottish Juice

"Look at that Scottish Juice..."
"Sweet Scottish Juice..."

lovely and sweet.
Scottish Juice by Skib-a -de-do September 16, 2008

Scottish Hibernation 

Occurs during the winter when a bear, most commonly of the grizzly or kodiak family, needs to find a nice warm cozy spot to take a several month long nap. What separates this special type of hibernation from the usual kind is that this bear finds a ridiculously floppy va-jay-jay and crawls inside it for the duration of the cold months.
Tom: Hey did you see Patty walk by? It looks like she's put on about 400 pounds in the pelvic region!

Stan: I know, I noticed that as well. Then again, it's almost winter, so I bet that bear we saw in the forest the other day is getting ready for a Scottish Hibernation.

Scottish Haircut 

The result of losing some of your hair after a bullet goes through your hair but narrowly misses your head.
Good thing that sniper had terrible aim he merely gave me a scottish haircut.
Scottish Haircut by horny4alligators September 11, 2010

Scottish Bagpipe 

The act of ejaculating into a bagpipe and shoving it down a woman's esophagus or anal cavity with great force while attempting to play a song on the instrument.
Sarah: You know that new Scottish kid? He Scottish Bagpiped me SO hard last night.
Jessica: Oh my god yah, he Scottish bagpiped me in the ass!
Sarah: The weird thing was he actually played a song too.
Jessica: Ya he's a dirty fuck if you ask me.
Scottish Bagpipe by xXx_Nut_Meme_xXx November 30, 2016

scottish dekko sam

A man who works in a low brow job as an economic migrant well having sexual interest in and older disabled man

ex. "Dave" im goner bugger you sam
ex. "sam" smash my wee ass I travelled to England for a living wage. freedom im just a wee porridge wog bugger me sexy .
freedom " other than my wee ass im Scottish dekko sam"