The absolute most amazing girl in the world. She will do anything in the world for you and has the most amazing personality. She'll love you for all your flaws and insecurities. She has the most beautiful eyes and the sexiest body. If you treat her right she'll show you what real love feels like. Hold on to her forever.
by Damianloveshisgf April 1, 2022
Get the Jaeda Johnson mug.When asked a question (any question) to which one thinks you know the answer, the verb to "Johnson" is to waffle, procrastinate and create sufficient bluster so as to fool, create absolute confusion and go off on a tangent, leaving the questioning party stunned and bemused.
To hide your absolute incompetence, or unpreparedness, or lack of understanding/comprehension by spouting totally irrelevant bullshit, including latin or greek which nobody understands, as an answer to a valid and simple question. When said with the unsolicited self-confidence of an expensive Conservative-funded public school education, the "Johnson" answer can be pulled from the bag in absolutely any circumstance.
To hide your absolute incompetence, or unpreparedness, or lack of understanding/comprehension by spouting totally irrelevant bullshit, including latin or greek which nobody understands, as an answer to a valid and simple question. When said with the unsolicited self-confidence of an expensive Conservative-funded public school education, the "Johnson" answer can be pulled from the bag in absolutely any circumstance.
I asked Boris what he'd like for dinner last night, and i got such a "Johnson" answer, i couldn't remember my name and i'd lost 25 minutes of my life. I felt like i'd been hit by a fucking bus. I do vaguely remember him spouting some shit about the Bermuda Triangle and what happened to Michael Jackson. I won't be doing that again.
by dying_fish September 26, 2020
Get the Johnson mug.When you get shit-dicked with pungent diarrhea. The kind that stings the nose and causes the eyes to water.
"I was on a Tinder date the other day and it went horrible. We had lunch at Taco Bell and she ended up giving me a Muddy Johnson later that night."
by Fructussy October 17, 2025
Get the Muddy Johnson mug.A loosely defined cocktail emerging on the west coast. A Bobby Johnson’s ingredients are made to order at the request of whatever the consumer feels like drinking at any given moment.
Patron: I’ll have a Bobby Johnson, please.
Bartender: .... (wears a look of confident hesitancy)
Patron: yea that’s a whiteclaw, whiskey, and lime on the rocks.
Bartender: of course, that’ll be $5
Bartender: .... (wears a look of confident hesitancy)
Patron: yea that’s a whiteclaw, whiskey, and lime on the rocks.
Bartender: of course, that’ll be $5
by B. Johnson August 28, 2019
Get the Bobby Johnson mug.Bald Eagle Johnson is a descriptive term or pejorative of a black woman who wears a hair hat instead of her real hair.
Dr. D Fraud: Hey playa whatcha doin this weekend?
Home Boy: I am about to knock the wallz off dis here Bald Eagle Johnson while her fat ass shakes on my jimmy!
Home Boy: I am about to knock the wallz off dis here Bald Eagle Johnson while her fat ass shakes on my jimmy!
by DrDFraud April 23, 2021
Get the Bald Eagle Johnson mug.by urbanbois October 28, 2019
Get the josie johnson mug.by Johny kwok March 27, 2019
Get the Johnson mug.