Goldilocks Turd

The immensely satisfying poop that comes after waiting just the right amount of time.
Person 1; "You look happy."
Person 2; "Yeah mate. Just had a Goldilocks Turd and I feel wonderful."
by M J V D G April 05, 2016
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albino turd

A term referring to white trash punk rockers who pretend they're in a band but never go to practice and only jam at guitar center.
When are the Albino Turds playing?
Never
by 6Stranger6Danger6 January 20, 2016
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turd whirler

A turd whirler is a pocket of air(fart) that travels down your poop shoot while whirling around the piece of poop you got in there. While it whirls and swirls about trying to get out, it captures the funky fresh aroma of the turd and then exits; letting you know you should probably go take care of that!
"Eww that stinks dude! It must be a turd whirler!"
by FMaye November 28, 2022
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turd burgler

A "Turd Burgler" is someone who acquires pooh to be used in some S&M practices, most notably the practice known as "The Huey Bar", all very secret of course but ther you go. This is the truth, it is not a homophobic slander at all.
Where the hell did you get that shit? Are you some kind of Turd Burgler?
by Huey Tank March 28, 2016
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turd gurggle

The sound the stomach makes moments before you take a crap.
"Ah, man my belly just turd gurggled."
by Chushyabbfle November 14, 2013
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Turd Trampoline

A layer of toilet paper put into the toilet to prevent a back splash whilst taking a dump.
Russ don't forget to lay out the turd trampoline. Protect that ass from the shit water splash.
by 123bdk March 30, 2021
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chambering a turd

Similar to the cycles of function for an M4 rifle, except that you are extracting a turd during anal sex, allowing it to fall level with the vagina, then chambering it into her pussy with your cock. Your penis is used as the bolt carrier group.
I don't think I will be seeing Sarah anymore. We got a little kinky last night and I ended up chambering a turd. The weird thing is she actually liked it, but I don't know if I can live with myself.
by trace brock January 12, 2019
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