bearded bat

A hairy penis.

"He told me he doesn't like bearded bat caves."
"What'd you do?"
"Punched him in the bearded bat."

by whalesgoaooarooaroo December 31, 2015

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Beard Madness

A short-lived surge of itch, prickling, and irritability that hits about 24–48 hours after a close shave, as stiff regrowing stubble and freshly sensitized skin team up to drive you into a slight frenzy. Typically lasts 1–4 days.

“Day-two Beard Madness has me wanting to claw my face off.”

by TwistedBobbay August 29, 2025

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release beard

A beard specifically grown in preparation for getting difficult/large-scale software features live.

I've been growing this release beard in preparation for our big 1.1 release next week. I'll shave it afterward.

by E money D December 21, 2017

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Shave Your Beard

To tell someone off over something pointless or ridiculous. Used when your friend is rambling about something that isn’t even your business and you just have to get him to shut the fuck up.

Ron: Yo bro! I talked to that Adrianna girl in school today. She’ll be my prom date! Isn’t this so ex-

Peter: Shave your beard, Ron.

Ron: What?

Peter: I said shave your beard Ron!

by IAmTheOneWhoShits December 9, 2024

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soft-bearded man

A man or manchild(usually a millennial) that has a beard but most likely gets it trimmed weekly. This man gets offended very easily, and violently opposes hate speech. He would not dare use his hands for manual labor or for properly pleasing a woman. He is a feminist, his wife makes more money than him, and he hates white privilege.

"Hey I heard Lumberjack Leslie has to ask his wife before he does anything!" "Yeah, he's a soft-bearded man."

by Scranton Strangler April 14, 2018

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