Sewer squirrel

Something that should never be in your living room

I saw a pig showing my little brother how to make bombs. I have a sewer squirrel and I’m running to the police with a racing heart

by Unorthodoxy August 15, 2025

Squirrel Method

The Squirrel Method is a technique where one takes advantage of the Rigor mortis Phenomenon by killing a squirrel, inerting their penis into said squirrel, and waiting for its muscles to stiffen creating a “personalized squirrel” that fits the users penis perfectly.

Joe: did you use the squirrel method bro?

Bobby: i did it was so tight

by S13Enjoyer January 23, 2025

squirrel squirrel diddle diddle

A squirrel movement

Did you hear about the squirrel squirrel diddle diddle protest later? It’s for a great cause.

by SquirrelGirl425 February 21, 2025

squirrel fight

Two men, aggressively rubbing their nuts together.

Me: “Hey you two, what are you doing !!”

Two nude men: “we’re having a squirrel fight !”

by GibbonLips August 3, 2024

skinning squirrels

Secretly jacking off

Where you been?

Hiding out in the back room skinning squirrels.

by BeavisBeavis May 17, 2025

Squirrel dinner

When you eat nothing but nuts (almonds, cashews, etc) for days on end to slim down.

Do you know what Cillian Murphy had to do to slim down for Oppenheimer? He had one almond a day. Dude had a squirrel dinner.

by Magenta Mage August 12, 2023

shiny squirrel syndrome

Somebody who is easily distracted by things other than what they're supposed to be focusing on.

Stephen has shiny squirrel syndrome, he will be talking on the phone and get distracted by something happening outside and just stop talking and focus on whatbis happening outside.

by Bill&bob October 3, 2023