new jersey
new jersey by guyjohn March 26, 2009
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New Jersey
Jersey in a nutshell, “fuh” starters people dislike “arrr” accents. People who are “Joisey” born and raised (No one says “joisey”, it’s “jurzee”) they have accents that may make them say “cawfee” or “dawg”, this is local flavor. Would you want every part of the country to sound the same? I’d want to go to Wisconsin and hear “Oh Shore Bud” so when I’m in Jersey I want to hear “Yo, how much fuh dem shewz”. Regions are boring without their local stuff. New Jerseyans are blunt, rude, loud, and short fused. But that’s just because we don’t know you yet. Catch us at a pizzeria or a “hoagie”,”cawfee”, or “baygal” shop, and we’ll be better. We go to Rutgers only and yes we’re upset that the Nets were moved from Jersey, no we don’t care about the Jersey Devil, or the Devils hockey team, that’s just pamphlet “gawbage”. (That’s Brooklyn) don’t you dare confuse us with that vile borough. At least you didn’t confuse us with Staten Island. *Shivuh down my “spooiine”* NJ is one of the safest places in the country, “jus” avoid Newark, Camden, Trenton, or Atlantic City. Well Maybe AC. If you go there don’t play any rap music loudly, unless it’s Meek Mill, or anything drill. You can go to the diners speckled around the state, and we take them seriously. Everyone goes to the mall for literally every other thing we buy.
Maybe you can buy a bathing suit to go to the “shore”, pronounced “shore”, and sure is pronounced “shore” as well, no it’s not confusing, and yes, you will see fake tans, dyed dark red weaves, and girls with hoop earrings. And don’t “fuhgit” about our poorly placed rose tattoos that lie behind our ears, or where you shouldn’t be looking. In New Jersey everyone is on their way to somewhere else, and you’ll get “chuh” “fillins” hurt if you drive the speed limit on any turnpike. Our roads are better than in “dirty asz new york”, and “bumpy asz philly”. And most of us aren’t italian, and no none of us want to be, and yes we think an hour drive is too “lawg”. We don’t pump “arr” own gas, you peasants. NJ is unique and if you live here it’s mostly like a lot of other places, but if look closely you can see that you get Yom Kippur off from school, and the state is dense af. Our weather is balanced, great theme parks, malls, authentically imported food, the “f’n” board”wawk” “fuh” “cryin” out loud. Oh yea, and fuck the Jersey Shore tv show.
New Jersey by maniwanttogohome September 23, 2021
New Jersey
Simply put, the best state in the Union. Too often, Jersey is judged on Newark and Camden and the slums. But the Jersey Shore and yes not the beach but the shore is the best. Everyone who hates Dirty Jerse should go Down the Shore. We have kickass pizza and bagels, and the best diners in america; food is where its at. We gave you Springsteen and the Sopranos, We have 2 NFL teams in Rutherford. And yeah we do know how to tawk.
New Jersey by Matt0912 July 21, 2009
New Jersey
New Jersey = The Arkansas of the East Coast. People from New Jersey are very proud of their state and the distinct flavor of white trash that comes with it.
"Can you believe that Cops was shodowing the police in Newark?" "No, they keep it pretty busy over there"
"New Jersey... New York's garbage dump"
"New Jersey... New York's garbage dump"
New Jersey by Snarky123 November 23, 2011
New Jersey
The richest state by per capita income in the US that contains the richest town in the US, the richest county in the US, and the richest area in the world. Better than Connecticut
New Jersey by Righteous Fist October 11, 2008
New Jersey
The worst state ever. Terrible laws. Rude people. Too many Fuck boys. Over flowing with hoes.
Subs are called Hoagies... like wtf is that?
(only acceptable thing is WaWa)
Subs are called Hoagies... like wtf is that?
(only acceptable thing is WaWa)
New Jersey by crringeworthy July 30, 2016
New Jersey
A state that makes itself out to be something great when really, it has little to offer. New Jersey boasts its beautiful shore, wilderness, its great people, and other things of the sort. Really, most of it's beaches are polluted with random garbage and New Yorkers, are crowded beyond belief, loaded with laws, and the water is coca-cola colored and cold year round. The wilderness is almost non-existent compared to other states, despite the large Pinelands Reserve (which is probably the nicest part of New Jersey). The people are for the most part very conceited, obnoxious, materialistic, coddled, and rich. Most are liberals, and drive around in some form of an expensive SUV or german sedan. Everyone praises the New York and Pennsylvania teams because NJ doesnt actually have any teams of it's own, and a good time either involves going to the mall, hanging out at the cold dirty beach, or eating. Girls here are known for hitting the wall at around 19 or 20, blowing up massively. Other problems with the state are...(you can verify the statistics through gov sites)
1. 3rd highest cost of living
2. 2nd highest state debt
3. 1st highest political corruption
4. 1st highest amount of superfund sites (toxic waste sites)
5. 51st (out of 51) best quality drinking water
6. 2nd most polluted air (NY is 1st)
7. 3rd worst traffic
8. 1st highest property taxes
9. 1st highest cigarette taxes
10. 5th highest adult AIDS rate
11. 3rd highest juvenile AIDS rate
12. 1st highest car insurance rate
13. 8th highest total illegal immigrant number (1st highest per sq. mile).
14. 1st highest population denisity
i guess i cant mention the bad without the good.....
1. 1st most trees per sq. mile
2. 12th most frequent hurricane stricken state
3. 4th best education system
1. 3rd highest cost of living
2. 2nd highest state debt
3. 1st highest political corruption
4. 1st highest amount of superfund sites (toxic waste sites)
5. 51st (out of 51) best quality drinking water
6. 2nd most polluted air (NY is 1st)
7. 3rd worst traffic
8. 1st highest property taxes
9. 1st highest cigarette taxes
10. 5th highest adult AIDS rate
11. 3rd highest juvenile AIDS rate
12. 1st highest car insurance rate
13. 8th highest total illegal immigrant number (1st highest per sq. mile).
14. 1st highest population denisity
i guess i cant mention the bad without the good.....
1. 1st most trees per sq. mile
2. 12th most frequent hurricane stricken state
3. 4th best education system
New Jersey is a God awful state; when I travel north, I go 3 hours around it just so I dont have to go through it.
Jeez, did you hear that guy from New Jersey, his accent sounded like shit, he wore wigger clothes and gold, and talked alot of smack about nothing; must be rough growing up with your daddy's porsche and a ocean side mansion.
Exceptions: South Jersey (NJ south of 195) escapes most of the afore mentioned negative attributes, and more closely relates to neighboring Delaware.
Jeez, did you hear that guy from New Jersey, his accent sounded like shit, he wore wigger clothes and gold, and talked alot of smack about nothing; must be rough growing up with your daddy's porsche and a ocean side mansion.
Exceptions: South Jersey (NJ south of 195) escapes most of the afore mentioned negative attributes, and more closely relates to neighboring Delaware.
New Jersey by ConfederateFlorida June 22, 2008