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Australian Letter Bomb

A potent mixed drink, usually part of a late-night drinking session at dive bars or pubs between a young bogan and his friends, often consumed as a statement of strength. The drink is made as follows:

1. 3/4 Schooner (425ml Beer Glass) VB

2. 1/2 Schooner Goon (Fruity Lexia) do not put red wine in it trust me
3. And a shot of rum Bundaberg Rum
4. Drop the shot into the Schooner and slam it down
Bogan: Can I get a Australian Letter Bomb?
Bartender: What's that?
Bogan: You work in a bar and you don't know what and Australian Letter Bomb is?

Australian Hammock 

The act of having sex between two trees(specifically very close to each other) where the women wraps her hands behind one tree and the man leans his back on the other and lifting her legs around him thus resembling the shape of a hammock
hey did you guys hear about chad? he took his girlfriend out into the woods last night and gave her an australian hammock!

Australian female v1nce 

An australian female v1nce.
Who is from Australia.
Australian Female V1nce what the f-

Australian Anus Augmentator 

This is the act of reaching up and pinching the balloon knot of your partner and then applying pressure with your tongue and humming the Australian National Anthem in the key of D major while giving a short but stout tug on the left nipple with a pair of vise grips and then using the other hand you fire up the dremel with a preloaded cutting wheel and you carve your initials in the partner's asscheek just as you are about to blow your load on the back of their neck and forehead
Robbie was quite sore after Rick gave him a Australian Anus Augmentator.

Australian Rules football 

Imagine a game of soccer.
Now take the following steps to reduce the skill as much as possible;
1) Remove the crossbar, so the ball can be kicked 10 meters over the opponents heads and still be a goal.
2) Reward the players with 1/6th of a goal for missing the target.
3) Remove the offside rule, so the forwards literally just stand around in front of their oppositions' goal and wait for someone to kick the ball to them.
4) Allow players to use their hands to catch and punch the ball.
5) Carrying on from point 4), give a player a free kick every time they catch the ball.
6) Change the shape of the ball so that it can travel further when kicked. This will help reduce the amount of passing ( = teamwork) needed to get the ball from one end of the field to another.
7) Remove all strategy. Make supporters so dumb that they actually *complain* when teams employ basic tactics such as flooding the defence, holding up the ball to look for a decent pass and running the clock down while keeping possession at the end of a match.

Now add some silly and fairly arbitary rules such as;
1) It is against the rules to push a player in the back, but it is allowed to run in from behind him, jump up, stick your knees into his back and catch the ball.
2) If you tackle (= bear hug & throw to the ground) a player, you get a free kick. Unless the umpire decides the tackled player did not have a chance to get rid of the ball before/while he was being tackled, in that case the umpire will bounce the ball instead. Unless in the course of the tackle you pushed him in the back - in that case he gets the free kick. Understand?

There you go, that is Australian Rules Football.
I don't have the skill required to play soccer, so I play Australian Rules Football instead.

australian rules football 

australian rules football can be described as the most skilless and effiminate form of football. Supporters are Australian possessing an IQ well below the requirements for basic shoe lace tying. Supporters are easily brainwashed by the AFL into thinknig that the sport is the most skillfull and physically tough sports around. In reality it possesses none of the skills and fancy footwork used in football, none of the physical strength toughness and fast hands needed for both forms of rugby.

Game is best described as: a bunch of sweaty blokes humping each other to the ground to get a touch of the oppositions arse and balls.
australian rules football= winter training for cricket

Tool: Bro lets watch a game of footy.
Real Auuseie: Fu.ck of back to melbourne you poof!