turd burglar

Someone who simply steals your poop. You could be taking a nice dump, not knowing what’s hiding in your shower, or under your sink… as soon as you stand up from the toilet and turn away for a second… your turd will be gone because the turd burglar took it. You will not catch them… nor see them.. unless they’re over 34 years of age. They are either assigned to a person at the age of 6, or placed into a house when built, and will steal everyone’s turds that ever lives there.

Frank - “Yo… I just took a shit, and when I turned around to flush… it wasn’t there”

Marlo- “oh, it was probably the turd burglar

by Stinkletoot May 26, 2024

Turd Burglar

When your out walking your dog and your partner picks up your dogs freshly laid faeces.

"Oh look Buddy here comes Fiona the Turd Burglar to rob your shit"

by Aldo83 December 4, 2025

Turd burglar

When my dog sniffs the yard for rabbit poops...and eats them.

"Baxter!...quit being a turd burglar and leave them rabbit turds alone. You better give mama kisses first with that breath!" 🤭

by YOU DONT SAY June 27, 2025

Turd Burglar

One who takes shit or allows themself to be spoken down to by others.

“Poor Jeff, he always allows his boss to talk down to him, poor turd burglar”

by Sir Francis Argaf June 8, 2022

turd burglar

-an individual who finds joy in sucking the joy from others.
-someone who sucks the joy away, as if taking the joy away from relieving yourself by pooping.
-to call someone a turd burglar means they ruin any enjoyable moment all the time.

All i wanted to do was enjoy a peaceful break from work, but my boss kept walking around the office. He's such a turd burglar.

by Bradgehog November 5, 2013

Turd burglar

A “Turd Burglar” is When Courtney R is being a crazy radioactive bad ass bitch w seven flavors of that bootylicious bubble gum.

Courtney is a total turd burglar

by Anner Bananaer March 8, 2025

Turd Burglar

When you Dog eats the Cat shit out of the litterbox

Turd Burglar example:

My Dog ate the cat shit out of the litterbox after refusing to eat the food I made, which included the fucking $7 frozen salmon burger I cooked on the stove to mix in with the super expensive Dog food I bought from the specialty pet store! Turd Burgler!

by 1a4Chuck December 1, 2025