douche couture

Type of clothing that a douche would wear.

Hey check out that dude's Ed Hardy T-shirt and the pointy shoes. He's wearing the latest in douche couture!

by 6FTJ400 August 2, 2012

Douche Technique

Either a solo or man-out technique used to lure attractive young women or girls to likeness or intercourse; generally at a bar, club, restaurant or casino much to the displeasure of others. It was made popular by Upstate New Yorkers to represent in an ironic fashion of how taking after a reality show such as Jersey Shore or dressing like such makes you win big or score, much to the chagrin of others, mostly because it works somehow. Liar too

"I heard that Jeb hooked up with that Jersey girl from Haggers" - Josh

"Yea he used the douche technique!" "Worked on the dumb brunette turned blonde!" - Benny

by Flailage August 21, 2012

douche a twelve

Screwing something up right at the last second when everything seems in hand; choking at the worst possible time in the worst possible way. This stems from the ambulance mission in the video game GTA III, which has twelve levels and takes forever and is hard and random and makes you want to throw things when a person you are trying to rescue on level 12 spawns inside a sidewalk and cannot move or runs into your ambulance and kills himself causing you to fail the mission and lose all that time and have to start over. Douching a twelve means to fail the mission on the final level, which, trust me, is just the worst.

Man, did you see that race? The leader really douched a twelve on the last turn right there!

Dude, you got this. Do NOT douche a twelve right here.

by Mytholces January 6, 2014

Douche-kabob

So many different levels and variety of douche you have to skewer them.

He is such a douche-kabob I can't even explain it.

by Friskycummings March 11, 2016

Book douche

One who ostentatiously reads and carries around highbrow literary fiction in public

Look, there goes Ira reading "The Crying of Lot 49" on the L Train. He's such a book douche.

by ryanosborne November 11, 2009

up-douche

To pompously attempt to outdo someone in such a way that makes you look like a douche-bag.

When already told they could not drink from the crystal chalice, Matthew up-douche'd the situation by also pointing out that the chalice is from Tiffany & Co.

After taking a shot of vodka, Jason up-douched himself by stating that he usually only drinks black label whiskey.

by seebass54 July 18, 2011

America's Most Wanted Douche Bag

This is a rarer form of the more common douche bag. This subhuman species spends most of his time in the guise of a slacker. However, when provoked by moderate levels of conflict or confrontation he immediately enters a state of heightened douchiness. Unlike the more common douche bag, he completely overreacts in response to a situation and is blindly driven by his own social impotence. His unusually extreme reaction will often manifest as either violence or behavior similar to that of an individual with a severe mental illness, such as schizophrenia.

As a general warning:

In recent studies it has been shown than the onset of this condition tends to begin in males in their mid thirties. If you suspect that a male in your life has already begun this transformation, it is recommended that you distance yourself from him at once. Keep in mind that this level of douchiness increases tenfold every year that it remains untreated.

To America's Most Wanted Douche Bag:
You know who you are. It is never too late to ask for help. But do not ask the people you have wronged. They have put up with you long enough.

by Dedicated Behavioral Biologist June 24, 2010