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Jesus-fix

To fix a problem that has been stumping someone else in an incredibly simplistic way on your first try, often by hitting or touching the object in question. The method used to fix the device may have already been tried multiple times, but just didn't work until you came along. This is reminiscent of how Jesus Christ supposedly healed the sick just by touching them.
My car horn was broken for months, but Tanner Jesus-fixed it on the first time he pushed it.

My friend's phone wasn't working for hours yesterday, but I came in and Jesus-fixed it when I turned it off and on even though she had already tried that five times.
by DaskinRobins October 7, 2011
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Jesus enthusiast

A lover of Jesus Christ. Someone who is very excited and happy about the topics of Jesus.
John is the biggest Jesus enthusiast that I have ever met!
by angiewangie October 31, 2017
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speeding-Jesus

A car passing you while you are speeding. This car will most likely get stopped by the police instead of you. Thus, they sacrifice themselves for your speeding sins.
Thank you speeding-Jesus; I can keep driving fast now, as long as you are in front of me. Speeding-Jesus take wheel.
by heathcat June 15, 2019
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Vibing With Jesus

by AYY ITS ME YOUR BROTHER! December 25, 2019
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Geneva Jesus

Forgives the sins of War criminals, so they may commit war crimes without prosecution and return to Valhalla. Civilians will now be known as "Acceptable Casualties".

Also the leader of the "Geneva Warcriminals" gaming clan on Twitch and Mixer.
"Geneva Jesus shall set me free, for I am his humble servant." GJ 6:9
by Geneva Jesus November 13, 2019
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jesus cut

Serving yourself a torn apart piece is bread from a larger serving. Much like Jesus would have cut the bread at the last serving, just tear what you want.
I took a jesus cut from th loaf of bread our server brought to our table, forget knives.
by the timio March 17, 2015
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jesus chode

when someone has a chode so fat juicy and delicious that Jesus himself must have a try
wow jonathan has a jesus chode, i could barely fit it in my mouth its so thick
by grannychodeman February 5, 2019
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