Breakfast Machine (noun, slang)
Definition:
A wildly over-complicated, theatrical explanation meant to distract from a simple lie, mistake, or inconvenient truth. Often full of unnecessary details, emotional sidetracks, and implausible logic, it’s used when someone could’ve just said, “I messed up,” but instead built a three-act play with puppets and smoke machines.
Definition:
A wildly over-complicated, theatrical explanation meant to distract from a simple lie, mistake, or inconvenient truth. Often full of unnecessary details, emotional sidetracks, and implausible logic, it’s used when someone could’ve just said, “I messed up,” but instead built a three-act play with puppets and smoke machines.
1.
“Spare me the breakfast machine and just tell me you were with your ex.”
2.
“That whole story was a damn breakfast machine. I stopped believing it at step four when the dog allegedly called 911.”
3.
“She couldn’t just say she was late—she gave me a breakfast machine involving a flat tire, a sick aunt, and Mercury in retrograde.”
“Spare me the breakfast machine and just tell me you were with your ex.”
2.
“That whole story was a damn breakfast machine. I stopped believing it at step four when the dog allegedly called 911.”
3.
“She couldn’t just say she was late—she gave me a breakfast machine involving a flat tire, a sick aunt, and Mercury in retrograde.”
by Angee Maree May 29, 2025
Get the Breakfast Machinemug. V. The act of spitting into another's throat, typically during intercoarse, that results in them asphyxiating and, in many cases, dying
by Toenail_eater23 July 14, 2020
Get the West Texas Fried Breakfastmug. When a girl on a farm (or in any Southern State) eats eggs for breakfast, and afterward starts sucking a guy's dick & she pukes the eggs on his dick... but like a Champ she keeps going, and swallows the eggs again while continuing to suck his dick.
by Gusthe3rd July 11, 2018
Get the ranchero breakfastmug. by Billlio January 21, 2017
Get the breakfast of championsmug. When two females shave their heads and pour syrup on their tits.Then the male continues to ejaculate into their eyes while dipping waffles on the females heads and shoving them up his anal cavity.
I had such an amazing Guatemalan Breakfast this morning,I won't be able to shit sideways for a few months!
by Twisted peddler 90 April 5, 2017
Get the Guatemalan breakfastmug. When you wake up from having sizzling, steamy dreams of your girl(or boy) and are bulging out of your boxer briefs and they’re waiting to devour it.
Oh baby I must have been thinking about how hot last night was. See this breakfast sausage ? It’s all for you. Thank you for an unforgettable night!
by Scrotal Apnea May 25, 2024
Get the Breakfast Sausagemug. PLS I'M BRAZILIAN AND I DON'T EAT SHIT FOR BREAKFAST 🤢THATS DISGUSTING WTF!!! I EAT BREAD, CEREAL BUT NOT SHIT!!! ANYTHING BUT SHIT 😭
by seggsynexono February 24, 2024
Get the Brazillian Breakfastmug.