Safety Wank

The act of masturbation prior to a sexual encounter, used to prolong intercourse.

Person 1: "Brooooo, I'm hooking up with Amy tonight!"
Person 2: "Oh nice dude, she's so hot!"
Person 1: "Tell me about it, I'm going to need a quick safety wank before going to her place."

by BicBoi4000 August 27, 2021

Wank Bandit

The act of sneaking into your neighbours house, connecting to and watching some porn on their own wifi until you ejaculate on a random thing in their home e.g. bed, sink, kettle etc. and go home like nothing happened.

This can also be done in schools, shops or other public venues.

Keith - “I left our neighbour Eugene a little present inside the dishwasher!”
Fredrick - “Dude that’s nuts”
Keith - “I know but not the kinda of nuts your thinking of, I pulled a wank bandit on him”
Fredrick - ...
Keith - “I also brutally slaughtered his wife and children”
Fredrick - “Nice”

by WalnutPaste April 20, 2020

the light is wank

what you say When there is no light in your room

The light is wank

by YTBENNYGPLAYZ June 15, 2020

micro wank

When you wanna climax but you don't have time to do the whole 45 minute shit. Feels fucking amazing, not recommended for the asthmatic community, and usually leaves you with a blister.

Pornhub: Ah neigh whinnymwinny, tu whit to woo, oink~twas brillig, coo coo, get on the washing machine, awhahahhahhhahhahhhhhh
Me: Fapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfap squirt heavy breathing.

That was a good little micro wank

by cancerisnotaverygoodthing February 1, 2017

wing wank

When you eat a portion of chicken wings then masturbate with the sauce still on your fingers.

Man after that pound of wings I had to go for a wing wank

by The_Absolute February 21, 2020

PB and Wank

When someone carefully inserts their yardstick penis into a jar of Peanut Butter and begins to hump it back and forth.

"When I get home, Im gonna do a good PB and Wank"

by connorsimpson May 24, 2017

Salary Wank

To masturbate while undertaking paid employment.

"Has anyone seen Charlie? "
"Yea, I think he's ducked out for a Salary Wank"

by Guido Lasalsa July 3, 2022