wanking about

To engage in dickish behavior. Used in the same spirit as "to fuck about", "fuck around", or "screw around".

We would have gotten here much faster if so many other drivers weren't wanking about the whole time.

by Not Dangerous Dickey November 19, 2015

muppet wank

During coitus, one partner (or a third person) inserts their full hand into the anus of the woman and grasps the man's penis through the walls of the rectum and vagina. They then proceed to masturbate the penis while simultaneously fisting the woman rectally.

Dude, I got muppet wanked by my girlfriends BFF during a threesome last night.

by Inoffensive_Account August 20, 2016

Mossi Wank

While on the vinegar strokes, you scratch a mosquito bite to enhance orgasm.

I had a better orgasm when I scratched the mosquito bite on my arm. Mossi Wank

by Eddie Brezz June 24, 2023

Posh wank

Masturbation with a condom

I had a fat posh wank yesterday.

by Dixie RectXd January 9, 2020

Essex wank

Sitting at the toilet and having a shit, then in the same toilet sesh you have a wank

Dirty cunts been on the toilet for ages, bet he's having an Essex wank

by kirn October 22, 2017

Memory Wanking

When you're horny as fuck and you don't have time to pull up any porn, so you just have to remember some porn you once watched

Beau: 'You took a while in there.'
Lachlan: 'Yeah I was memory wanking!'
Beau: 'Fuckin legend'

by Your Local Perth Guide July 19, 2021

Prison Wank

Exactly what it says on the tin. To masturbate whilst in prison.

Most criminals enjoy a good prison wank.

by TheFunnyGuy88 June 29, 2022