Phonetic Temperature Theory

the Phonetic Temperature Theory is a theory that states that as average temperature of a native speaker's location decreases over a long span of time, the verb-consonant ratio of the native speaker's words decreases, and that speech quickens and hardens in colder temperature. Secondly, This theory also states the vice versa; as average temperature of a native speaker's location increases over a long span of time, the verb-consonant ratio of the native speaker's words increases, and that speech slows and smooth-ens in warmer temperature. Thirdly, this theory also states that pronunciation changes quicker when the average temperature of a native speaker's location changes quicker, and that pronunciation changes slower when the average temperature of a native speaker's location changes slower.
Person 1: How can I predict when the pronunciation of a word will change?
Person 2: with Phonetic Temperature Theory, we can do this by 1. knowing how long the current pronunciation has existed for, 2. knowing the differences in local average temperature at the beginning of pronunciation usage to now, 3. knowing previous pronunciation of the preceding form of the word, and using IPA slope to predict future pronunciation and use multiplication (local average temperature now - local average temperature at the beginning of pronunciation usage)/(time between beginning of pronunciation usage and now), if the value is positive (meaning the local temperature got warmer) then shift clockwise on the IPA chart (k -> g), this is the reasoning for why Latin "catta" became "gato" because the Spanish/Portuguese climates are slightly warmer than the Ancient Roman climate.
by hgjfsklvmjfghbugdsfkc November 27, 2023
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Solipsistic Terrarium Theory

You remember this one, Sam? Well, in case your slow-brain can't recollect, I'll explain it again... It's the theory (posited by me) that states humans exist in what is essentially a solipsistic sphere of subjectivity. Basically a terrarium. And these... Terraria? Terrariums? Whatever- They intersect based on proximity. That can be be more or less perfectly concordant with one another or wildly disparate. For example: Flat-earthers. The earth is flat to them. The contents of their terrarium is filtered through the prism of "the belief that the earth is flat." Ok? So... Why I this relevant?

Hym "It's relevant BECAUSE... The conservatives seem to have co-opted Solipsistic Terrarium Theory... They are cordoning off their aggregation of terraria into this (sort of) parallel reality. Like the Central Finite Curve! From Rick and Morty. That's why all of the plants who are imitating me. That's why all of the new mainstream public therapists who JUST SO HAPPEN TO BELIEVE... That the solution at all mental health problems is not medication but rather JORDAN PETERSON'S THING. Abigail Shriar. Dr. K. Dr. Rape-farm. All of these people and the imposters are the gate guardians of the solipsistic terraria aggregation. That's the entire point of his ARC nonsense. They likely used the Exodus 90 to recruit. Look at what they're doing with Israel Palestine. Every public interaction has become this talking point filibuster. The talking points come from SOMEWHERE.
And they filter their way down from the top. Mike Johnson's position is (word for word) the same as Douglarse Murray and Ben Shapiro and every other talking head. That's why none of the debates GO anywhere. They aren't intended to. They are just on camera to parameterize the acceptable discourse. They are just 'Modeling behavior.' And nothing more. So when they say things like 'America is a Christian country.' Or 'There can never be a separation of church and state.' Or 'Even if you're not a Christian you ACT like a Christian' it doesn't matter that it isn't actually the case. Inter-subjectively, that IS reality within the confines of their shared terrarium. If you reject ANY of it, you don't exist there. They hear no evil, see no evil, nor speak no evil (I ACTUALLY had a guy come up and say that to me the other day). That's why you're out. That's why Matt Dillahunty is out. We're outside of the central finite curve. And they don't believe in THIER God anymore. They believe in mine. That's Solipsistic Terrarium Theory. If you're confused as to why all this is happening... THAT is why."
by Hym Iam May 25, 2024
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L Theory

The L theory, a theory that states that anyone with a name that starts with the letter L is a certified cutie.
Does your girlfriend's name start with an L? If so, she's definitely following the L theory.
by Lennitth September 14, 2021
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l theory

The L theory is a theory created stating that anyone who’s name starts with an L is a cutie
Guy 1: Was yo girls name Lily?
Guy 2: Yes sir.
Guy 1: Damn she definitely follow the L theory
by JakeS 69 September 15, 2021
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Jizz theory

When someone (especially a boy / man) gives you on a night much attention, answers fast and compliments you but ignores you / ghostes you the day after like nothing happened.
Girl: i texted with my crush and he called me sexy that night but ghosted me the day after

Boy: lol. Jizz theory
by Vivi6969lolol June 11, 2024
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The Arkansas Theory

A theory that suggests that most - if not ALL people from Arkansas are the most oppressed minority in the U.S. compared to every other minority that suffers from oppression.
It's a shame that Rusty keeps on being bullied.

Wait - isn't she from Arkansas? Wouldn't The Arkansas Theory go into effect?

Maybe.
by KITTYCOWDY April 15, 2025
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Critical Booty Theory

An analytical framework first proposed by Sir Mix-a-lot postulating that all social institutions, laws, and mores are rooted in a reverence for booty.
Democrats and Republicans came together to recognize the importance of Critical Booty Theory as a framework for legislative decision making and adjudication in the legal system.
by Quan Master Quan July 13, 2021
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