turd barnacle

A person who is generally perceived to be so incompetent that all tasks given to them invariably turn to shit.

This applies especially to those who (for one reason or another) are not, or cannot be fired, and they drift along clinging to their shitty work, sinking project after project in a craptastic cataclysm of titanic proportions.
I hate dealing with Jenkins, that turd barnacle in marketing. I spell out exactly what I need, and he still manages to screw it up. He's promised the client a rocket powered nose hair trimmer that runs on gummy bears.
by kynaris May 10, 2011
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Floating turd

A party pooper. One who ruins the fun of things, like a little kid pooping in a bathtub.
SO we were kissing and then his GIRLFRIEND walked in and was like wtf man
::omg what a FLOATING TURD::
yeah i know right??
by Rebecca!! September 15, 2006
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Orange Turd

An alchoholic beverage. Mix 70 percent Malibu rum and 30 percent Jager, stir in 1 Tsp. orange kool-aid, drop in 2 slices of orange, serve chilled.
I can't believe you hooked up with that nasty ho last night!

I was orange turdin' all night, at least it was a chick!
by Hot Lettuce November 03, 2010
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Turd Spelunker

The lead singer of Flobots is a primordial turd spelunker.
by Anonymous000856 January 12, 2009
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Turd-Basket

A person who collects crap on other people behind their backs making themselves look like shit. Often a small punk who has no life or personality trying to make himself look better, but instead is often hated.
Wow, look at this kid running his mouth again.
Yeah, what a turd-Basket.
by Alessria November 12, 2010
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turd burgler

"Dude, that was put away for stealing poo." "You mean he's a turd burgler?" "Yup." "How longs he in for?" ""Three to five depending on if he stops bogardting the prisoners anal nuggets."
by Anonymous July 12, 2003
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Turd Coat

Simply a coat made entirely of human turds (different from the Turd Jacket which can be made of any human OR non-human scat)
Hello Denise! you look fetching in your new turd coat.
by Rex Fortune January 16, 2010
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