Your dad lesbian lmao

The only way to counter the insult “your mom gay lol”. Using this will save your life and as a result bounce back all the gayness to the other person and end them instantly.

Obama: Hello my fellow Americans, I-
Your dumbass: haha dude your mom gay lol
Obama, staggering under all the gayness you just imbued on him: Oh yeah, well your dad lesbian lmao
Tú: oh shit *dies*

by Pinklepuff February 21, 2018

Step-dad

A colossal loser who marries your mom and is sweet at first but then will get increasingly abusive towards you. He doesn't see you as a human being. You are a constant reminder of another man's dick being inside his wife. The greatest obstacle between him and your mom having a beautiful life together. Reason for his every irritation and problem. A guy who will abuse you only emotionally if he is a coward and also physically if he is a loser.

He will seem like the nicest guy ever in front of the rest of the family. Like a hero and the greatest blessing for you and your mom. He will never show his dark side to anyone but you and your mom. Actually the though of someone knowing about his abusive behavior is the most terrifying thing in existence for him.

Also thank your mom who exchanged your childhood and healthy mental development for regular dick and payed checks.

But there will be a day when you will stand up to your loser step-father and it will be a moment of pleasure. At that moment you won. From there on things will never be as they used to be. Tables will turn slowly and you will end up freed from your loser step-father eventually.

My new step-dad is so nice. He buys me a lot of gifts and plays with me.

My step-dad no longer plays with me.

My step-dad yells at me sometimes. E.g. for not taking out the garbage.

My step-dad constantly remind me he pays for my food and living, despite the fact I'm in 7th grade.

My step-dad doesn't allow me to eat food that my mom cooks anymore. My mom has to buy me separate food.

My step-dad throws the garbage bags into my room. Then tells me to stop crying.

My step-dad constantly reminds me to go live with my real father.

My step-dad always yells at me why am I still here.

My step-dad doesn't allow me to go out.

My step-dad prevents me from going to the bathroom or clean my teeth or shower.

My step-dad doesn't allow me to move around the house or keep the light on in my room because he pays for the electricity.

Yesterday I started called my step-dad a motherfucker. I slammed doors. Threw thing at him. Told him I was here first. Told him he can go fuck himself and his rules.

My step-dad is afraid to say something to me. He bitches about me only to my mom.

I moved out out the house. I am no longer living with my step-dad.

by Ahojli January 17, 2020

Baseball Dad

Middle-classed men who usually drive pickup trucks, ban their kids from watching showing with swearing in it or anything PG-13, ground their kids all the time or take away their electronics frequently, and attend sporting events such as football, or baseball (hence the name) and making them chop wood in the morning.

Watch out! The baseball dads are taking up the parking lot about to fight!

by SunFlow3 March 20, 2021

my dad left when i was 4

my dad left when i was 4 because i shit on his phone as a baby (4 yrs old).

i was thinking about how my dad left when i was 4 a couple of days ago.

by McChikn November 29, 2021

Doorway Dad

What you imagine is behind that cracked door during your fapfest? It's Doorway Dad. He knows when you're awake, he knows when you're asleep. And he watches you masturbate. Beware!

I couldn't fap last night I was being spied on by Doorway Dad. :(

by Doorway Security November 3, 2009

koala dad

A male parent whose fostering style is warm, supportive, unpretentious, and aware.

My tiger mom told me this week I had to win the chess tourney, run for class president, rule the tennis team, and have my room ready for Architectural Digest, but my koala dad said let's just go get ice cream.

by panged April 12, 2015