painter's key

A simple steel tool about the thickness of a large nail, 3-4 inches long, with a loop on one end and a flattened, upturned blunt tip on the other side. Used for opening paint cans.

Opening this can of varnish sure would be easier with a painter's key.

by B SIDE December 17, 2018

Keys

On websites where the term "kys" or kill your-self is banned users will say keys to indicate their ill will directed towards another.

"fuck you asshole keys"

by cumguy4 June 23, 2023

Key-Lime Pie

Coughing or sneezing onto a vagina until it is covered with phlegm then proceeding to ejaculate for the whipped cream topping.

Guy: I gave this sexy Latina chick a Key-Lime pie last night.

by LovelyRotting June 27, 2015

portal key

An atypical blotter of really good LSD (taken in sublingual fashion); pristine and delicate yet iridescently powerful is it's gravity to take on the machinations of the mind and surroundings ad infinitum and channel it into a force to be reckoned with by which opening up a portal to the forbidden garden to those that would partake in it's fruits of sunshine, wisdom, eternity and also lastly it being a most comforting sanctuary of insanity safe from the world for those that would like to take a vacation from eternal struggle and thus temporarily and essentially rid the user in life that takes such a key of the "brand of sacrifice" much like the protagonist character Guts in the anime and or manga series' Berserk, etc. whom bears it. There's usually a forecast for an electric blizzard of bubbles no less upon taking a portal key in the right setting; as per usual with such with a setting dependent key to other worlds much like the comforting magical insanity of the video game series Kingdom Hearts with the keyblade and hearts and whatever Kingdom hearts actually is. WTF is Kingdom Hearts anyway?! Anyways; portal keys.

Side effects: seeing colors and or visual disturbances that are dose and or setting dependent, experiencing real sunshine inside oneself, obtaining forbidden wisdom, experiencing eternity and or an absence of time present as a concept, feeling a logical and or an unknown feeling yet comforting insanity dependent on the experience of the portal key wielder, etc.

James: Hey Randy! We hold the power of Gods! Randy: I know man; these portal keys opened a portal to Nosgoth for us lil' vampires once more. Muahaha.

by Arcana_Cat December 13, 2023

Keyed

Being the "perfect" level of high from marijuana.

The reference is that keys need to be perfect for their respective locks.

Man, I'm keyed right now. :)

by MrCush3 December 1, 2016

"stutter key" expense

Refers to da pesky (and invalid/unfair) extra "last-number-redial" charge dat you unintentionally incur when you try to dial "*67" to block your number from a caller-ID machine, but accidentally end up dialing "*66" because da contacts on your phone's "6" key are a bit wobbly/worn and thus falteringly "bounced" for an instant when you were pressing da key, incorrectly causing dat digit to be dialed twice.

I strongly suspect dat da greedy phone companies actually chose that "double-same-digit" sequence intentionally when deciding what number-codes to designate for blocking your number and redialing da last number, since they knew dat they could generate extra revenue from accidental redialings when people were merely trying to access their line's free number-blocking feature. Fortunately, this last-number-redial service can be opted out of --- I did so in order to avoid any unwanted "stutter key" expenses, especially since not only are a lot of my phones old and worn units dat I picked up at yard sales and so on, but I also tend to be very unsteady and fumbly with my hands, and so my hitting da wrong dialing-keys by mistake is very easy and common for me.

by QuacksO February 8, 2020

key jangler

a person who likes to jerk your chain, or in this case, your keys

That guy Lincoln sure is a key jangler.

by the kidd ego August 16, 2018