Jesus

A fictional character created by a cult that developed into Christianity. Jesus is now falsely thought to have existed and some even think he was the son of god... and god.. at the same time. There is no historical evidence, writings or anything about Jesus during the time he supposedly lived. No accounts of Jesus were written until decades after he supposedly ascended into heaven. 30 or more years passed before he was written about, which was about the average life span back then. So how did a whole new generation write about something they didn't even witness for themselves? Don't you think some people would write about Jesus WHILE he was performing these miracles? Mithras Dionysus share VERY similar stories with Jesus and had cults like Christianity. You should not believe anything you’ve just read, but look up the evidence facts, and decide for yourself. Luigi Cascioli has accused the catholic church of falsely saying Jesus existed. They will have to present evidence that he did. If they cannot accomplish this they will no longer be able to say Jesus existed as a fact in Italy. This should be a fairly large blow to christianity.

Follow Jesus or you will burn in hell forever! jk he isn't even real lol.

by FreeThinker2007 August 21, 2007

Jesus

One of the good guys.

Apparantly Jesus saves people like Spider-man.

by Flealan July 18, 2006

Jesus

Mythological Goalkeeper from Nazareth; he probably reached his peak around 27/28 AD.

Jesus saves! ..... Passes to Moses! ...... GOOOOOAAAALLLLL!!!!!

by Kenneeeeee January 24, 2008

jesus shitting christ

noun;adjective:
a term used when something is incredibly fucking supprising or when some one or something is:
A.Fucking Retarded
B.Smells like shit
C. or is stoned OFF THEIR ASSES, rolling, or tripping and did or said something incredibly memorable, rediculous, funny, smart.ect.

"Jesus shitting christ! I´m tripping so hard, that i saw the tree from Pochahontas!"

"Jesus shitting christ! did you eat a fucking corpse?"

"Britney was really a virgin all that time? Jesus shitting christ."

by KeViN (nwapsnatas666) September 6, 2006

CoD Jesus

Someone that is insanely good at CoD (Call of Duty). CoD is synonymous with MW2 (Modern Warfare 2). A CoD Jesus is a player usually very skilled and often accused of modding, hacking or cheating.

Synonym: Munk3yNuts1

Antonym: F Bobby

Random Player: "OMG that Munk3yNuts1 guy is a CoD Jesus, look at his K/D!!!"

F Bobby: "What about me?"

Random Guy: "Nah, you're negative, MunkeyNuts1 is a CoD Jesus"

by mynutsonyourface! February 23, 2010

Jesu5

Believed to be the true name of the Messiah, Christ, come down from Heaven to redeem us for our sins. Apparently, the Holy Bible lists this name incorrectly several times, as 'Jesus'.

"Then said Jesu5, 'Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.'" -Luke 23:34

by Farn July 27, 2006