turtles autograph

A poo smear on the back of your underpants caused by the emerging stool

I need the toilet right now, I've just had the turtles autograph.

by papers July 17, 2011

dip the turtle

have sex. Comes from the head being shaped as a turtle dipping into a very wet pussy.

"so you spent five hours with the girl, and you didnt even dip the turtle, man!"--Mike and Gary (its a show on Comedy Central)

by bojzzle October 6, 2004

Turtle Club

A restaurant/bar located in Hoboken, New Jersey known for having bands giving performances there. Delicious food and the lights are very dim giving people such experience.

I stopped by Turtle Club to see Tess and TJ performing before heading to flight school. Tess is such an amazing singer and TJ is very good with guitar.

by NHRHS2010 July 20, 2011

turtle dove

a small, flightless bird resembling a pigeon with a turtle shell on its back. It is almost completely useless, and lives in a tree all its life owing to the fact if it tries to jump down it will die (the turtle shell means it is too heavy to fly). Their diet composes of leaves, fruit, and any cat/monkey/other that climbs their tree.

how are your turtle doves doing, Dave?
Not very well, Bill. One of them swallowed my cat.

by unoriginally November 22, 2020

Barking Turtle

noun: A loud popping fart that is accompanied by a "turtle" or turd poking its head out each time air escapes.

I hurried to the bathroom to release my barking turtle back into the pond.

by MRia October 24, 2013

Escape Turtle

(n) one who, despite warnings and/or rules designed to safeguard their physical and/or mental well-being, breaks free and exhibits deliberate, rebellious behavior, disregarding long term consequences in favor of short term gratification. Shortened version of the sage proverb "the escape turtle breaks its shell."

Person1: "I should have gone to bed early before this exam, but stayed up all night watching my favorite show on Netflix. I definitely failed."
Person2: "Don't be such an escape turtle next time."

by ProfessorTurtle July 30, 2017

Turtle Breath

Turtle Breath is the fart that precedes the Turtle head. It is directly out of the mouth of the turtle head therefore more rank smelling than usual.

Mate that fart is really RANK!

Yeah I know, it's the Turtle Breath

by Strandhogg December 14, 2012