Crouton

A hipster on steroids - but not the cool kind. Recognizable by a) a bunch of face jewelry b) pink box died hair or c) thrifted cotton turtlenecks. The easiest way to spot a crouton however, is via their “artsy” Instagram feed.

Pinelopi: “There’s a new guy living across the hall!”
Sarah: “Ooouu is he cute?”
Pinelopi: “Meh, he’s a crouton”

by it’s Danielle not Daniel April 23, 2018

Drink Crouton

When Starbucks puts a piece of dried fruit in your drink. You have a drink crouton.

“Whoa is that a piece of dried pineapple in your Starbucks drink?”

“Yeah! It’s a drink crouton!”

by hag4eva August 1, 2022

Crouton

A “stale cracker” by analogy to the salad topping. Similar in usage to “ok boomer” but more contemptuous. Used to mock someone for stereotypically “old, white” behavior. Superlative is “absolute” akin to “absolute unit”.

You demanded to speak to the manager and then demanded they “go back to where they came from?” Ugh you absolute crouton.

by Jockeys41 June 21, 2025

Pants Crouton

When you don't wipe very well and a little bit of poop gets left in there and it gets all dry and crusty.

Aww man, I've got the biggest pants crouton right now.

by suttenplant October 11, 2015

Crouton

N: the seeds from a Cannibus plant

man this shit has a lot of croutons

by Geoffrey May 13, 2005

Crouton

A racial slur against bread people

"Man, Seefop is a real crouton"
-Some dead person

by dragonex564 April 15, 2021

Motley Crouton

The main ingredient in Motley Crust which is served with mozzarella.

"Ashes to ashes and dust to dust. With this Motley Crouton, we make Motley Crust."

by ANOTHERDEADROMEO March 7, 2023