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bater hater

A person who despises the act of masturbation. Generally, said person is religious, but that isn't always the case.

When dealing with a religious bater hater, it is best to avoid the issue of masturbation at all costs. Failure to avoid the issue will result in a pissing contest between you and the person and possibly a lengthy discussion on the finer points of religion, which is probably something you don't want to hear.

When dealing with a non-religious bater hater, it is common practice to try to convert them to the dark side, better known as bation nation. If they are unwilling to convert, it is usually best to write them off as a lost cause. If failure isn't an option, you could try to convert the person by continuously reminding them about what they are missing out on, or if you are so inclined, you could offer them a hand job. However, it is often best to cease and desist your attempted transformation and instead use that time to concentrate on refining your art. And by art, I don’t mean finger painting, although you can use your hand....

For those of you that are religious and practice masturbation, I would just like to say that you are a credit to your creed. It is so refreshing to know that a religious person can actually be open-minded about something, especially something that is commonly forbidden in most religions. Keep on trucking and all that jazz.
Altar Boy: Father, is it okay for me to...you know...touch myself?

Priest: What do you mean my son?

Altar Boy: Well, I think I have committed a sin father...I masturbated today during church.

Priest: That is blasphemy! Jesus died for you and this is how you repay him?

Altar Boy: *whispers* God damn that Jesus...he is such a bater hater.

Priest: I heard that! Now come over here and allow me to fulfill my sexual desires.

Altar Boy: Oh, I see how it is. So it is perfectly acceptable to molest young boys, but when it comes to masturbation, it is a sin?

Priest: Yes, my son. Isn't religion grand?

Altar Boy: Screw this, I am out of here! Don't bater hate me, bater hate somebody else. *runs off*

Priest: Come back here my son! Rats, I lost another one to bation nation! You will not evade me Altar Boy_01!
by IAMSODOT June 22, 2004
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Master Baster

A person who has achieved excellence at keeping things moist.
"Someone tell the Master Baster that the Dip Chicks need more moist."

My ballin-ass personal chef is a Master Baster.

My dumb cunt wife served me dry turkey. Next Thanksgiving I'm hiring a Master Baster--and maybe a dip set, as well.
by Ballin4DipChicks January 1, 2009
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master baiter

A well-skilled angler who is an expert at petting his one-eyed snake.
by The Master Baiter September 9, 2004
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Basterd

A clever misspelling of the word BASTARD used to ensure your movie title stands out when Googled.
by Jane Oak August 1, 2009
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Banter

The magnificent art of using word play, opinions, exaggeration, irony, sarcasm, and other comedic themes to (playfully) humiliate, make fun of, and laugh at your friends. This word is most commonly used in Britain, but 'Banter' is used around the world.
Joe: Your dick is so small!
Steven: Your mum didn't seem to mind it last night

Both: Banter m8 yh init
by Domesh August 29, 2014
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banter burglar

A sorry individual who claims others banter as his own.
Commonly grabs banter from one group of friends and recycles it to use on another group, hence claiming it as their own.
Vinny: Oi Wreck, I saw a German bloke in a herlequin suit when I was in Amsterdam the other week! Unbelievable banter!
Wreck: Yea?? Really?? U cunt, Mills already told me that story, u fuckin banter burglar
by Wreck September 22, 2005
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Bantermobile

A car that is often accociated with banterous events.
"To the bantermobile, so we can have light hearted banter with strangers and then jamie their dogs!"
by L-Cooper June 25, 2009
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