Splinter me timbers

A masturbation related injury

Guy 1: *walking along awkwardly*
Guy 2: Hey buddy, what happened to you?
Guy 1: I was watching Mudhole Nuns Gone Wild 76 and got too excited, next thing I knew, splinter me timbers!
Guy 2: Oh my lawdy...

by PrinceCharming6.9 May 10, 2015

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Who's choking on the splinters

Employees that suck on the wood penis on the Boss ....aka buttsniffers, suckass

Damnit I tired of all the "Who's choking on the splinters" types around work.

by williedoitnow August 10, 2022

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Splinter train

The act of rubbing one's anus back and forth across a plank of wood in order to receive pleasure and, inevitably, splinters.

I splinter trained last night. Very enjoyable.

by Cucumber101 July 08, 2017

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Arse splinters

Arse splinters. - when you do a fibrous nutty log and it rips on the way out.

I’m never eating pistachios again after the Arse splinters they gave me this morning.

by Jay.Bee December 21, 2023

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The Click Splinter

When your cock slips off your computer mouse and briefly rubs over the piece of balsa wood that you use as a mouse pad and in turn gives your penis tip a splinter

I can not describe how pleasant the click splinter was and how unpleasant my mom's mexican wedding planner can be and is

by CrippleDOGS January 06, 2011

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