swimming instructor

One who is sneezed on, kicked, cried at and generaly critisized for attempting to make your kid not sink to the bottom of the pool. An occupation involving hours of cold water and silly songs.

When Timmy didn't complete level 6 I sure gave that swimming instructor a peice of my mind!

The manager told the swimming instructor 'If you are not acting in such a way that you would be embarressed to be seen by your friends you are doing it wrong!'

by Khezef June 27, 2008

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swimming in the red sea

To perform oral sex on a woman while she is on her period.

Baby, I love you so much that for our anniversary, I'm gonna go swimming in the Red Sea.

by Grouch April 20, 2004

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swimming in the kiddie pool

When you prowl for and hook up with people younger than you

Carlie "I love highschool boys"
Laura "Me too, let's go swimming in the kiddie pool tonight!"
Carlie "We can invite Louie, Brian and Dustin"

by cougartown1357 July 7, 2010

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swimming dick

when the penis shrivels up due to being in water or cold weather

Clifford had a bad case of swimming dick after skinny dipping in the cold water.

by texanguy November 20, 2010

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swimming with the lads

Swimming with the lads is when you jack off into a bathtub and then proceed to swim in it for at least 30 minutes.

Father: I had such a good time swimming with the lads.
Son:.... what is that daddy?
Father: Listen here son...

by Ggirentafogg January 19, 2018

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swimming pool

A pool of water used for teaching children to swim or simply for swimming for relaxation or to keep fit. Outdoor ones are best avoided in summer as they end up like a swampland with wildlife to match.

Never swallow any water in a swimming pool. Ten to one someone has gone for a piss (or worse) in the pool.

by Stormsworder May 31, 2007

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