scientology is fucking stupid
by Where the frogs February 26, 2017
1. A tax-exempt corporation with the facade of a "bona-fide" religion created by L. Ron Hubbard as a way to make money when his "better-than-psychology" clinics failed to do so in the 1950s.
2. The act of engaging in sexual intercourse with a piece of scientific equipment, such as a microscope.
3. A sexual act whereby a man reads a science textbook to a woman who then becomes bored. When she inevitably falls asleep, the man hits her over the head with the textbook, yelling "science!" He then takes off her top and studies her breasts whilst masturbating. Upon completion, he jisms into the open textbook, smears his essence all over the open pages, and sticks the textbook to the woman's face. He may then, at his option, invite people over to "study" with her, thereby causing her severe embarrassment when she comes to.
2. The act of engaging in sexual intercourse with a piece of scientific equipment, such as a microscope.
3. A sexual act whereby a man reads a science textbook to a woman who then becomes bored. When she inevitably falls asleep, the man hits her over the head with the textbook, yelling "science!" He then takes off her top and studies her breasts whilst masturbating. Upon completion, he jisms into the open textbook, smears his essence all over the open pages, and sticks the textbook to the woman's face. He may then, at his option, invite people over to "study" with her, thereby causing her severe embarrassment when she comes to.
1. Scientology Auditor: "Hey, you, man walking down the street that appears to have better things to do! Yes, you! Would you like to be audited such that we can eventually remove your Thetans after charging you thousands of dollars for brainwashing?"
Man: "No."
2. Woman: "Oh yeah baby, adjust that coarse focus knob!"
3. Girl's Roommate: "Damn, were you up all night studying again?"
Girl: (Just coming to) "Ugh, what time is it?"
Girl's Roommate: "What, I can't hear you with that textbook on your face. And why does my microscope smell?"
Girl: (Rips the book off, but the inner pages stick to her face) "I have no idea, but I must have been sitting down too long because my ass hurts".
Man: "No."
2. Woman: "Oh yeah baby, adjust that coarse focus knob!"
3. Girl's Roommate: "Damn, were you up all night studying again?"
Girl: (Just coming to) "Ugh, what time is it?"
Girl's Roommate: "What, I can't hear you with that textbook on your face. And why does my microscope smell?"
Girl: (Rips the book off, but the inner pages stick to her face) "I have no idea, but I must have been sitting down too long because my ass hurts".
by scorpionmintred February 17, 2010
Guy 1: Hey, dude, you know what I just realised?
Guy 2: What?
Guy 1: Scientology is just like Christianity.
Guy 2: What?
Guy 1: Well, they both involve some great celestial being and people believing in what they read in a fiction novel.
Guy 2: Holy shit.
Guy 2: What?
Guy 1: Scientology is just like Christianity.
Guy 2: What?
Guy 1: Well, they both involve some great celestial being and people believing in what they read in a fiction novel.
Guy 2: Holy shit.
by Willdood December 31, 2009
A dumb ass religion that has stolen a beloved actor named Tom Cruise. It's also the main religion Anonymous and 4-chans roasts and exposed. A fucked-up cult.
Christian: God is my savior.
Muslim: Allah is my savior.
Scientologist: Thetan is my sempai. He fuckin thicc. America is fucked without scientology.
Atheist: You guys really need some help.
4-chans user: it's not the christian or muslim. It's the scientologist.
Atheist: ok.
Muslim: Allah is my savior.
Scientologist: Thetan is my sempai. He fuckin thicc. America is fucked without scientology.
Atheist: You guys really need some help.
4-chans user: it's not the christian or muslim. It's the scientologist.
Atheist: ok.
by tbone42 October 28, 2018
A whole load of shit. It's one of very few things that Christians and Atheists can agree on. It was founded by a science FICTION WRITER. At least there are/have been some intelligent people who can defend/justify Christianity (John Lennox, William Lane Craig, C.S. Lewis, Ravi Zacharias ect) but when it comes to scientology, it's not scientific and a whole load of utter carp.
Christian: I believe god is real
Atheist: I believe he is not real
Scientologist: Have you guys heard of Scientology
Christian and Atheist: SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU WEEBFUKTARDWANKER
Atheist: I believe he is not real
Scientologist: Have you guys heard of Scientology
Christian and Atheist: SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU WEEBFUKTARDWANKER
by Fizzer205 October 28, 2020
A mix between a cult and a very well organized crime ring creatively invented by arguably the best and most successful criminal mastermind ever.
The Scientology organization is so ingenious because their victims are rich, shallow, self important, liberals and actors. They prey on these people because they are dumb, dry, and tastless like rye toast hold the butter.
The Scientology organization is so ingenious because their victims are rich, shallow, self important, liberals and actors. They prey on these people because they are dumb, dry, and tastless like rye toast hold the butter.
One year ago:
Esther: Herbert, I just joined Scientology!
Herbert: Great!
Present Day:
Esther: Herbert, it's all a lie, Scientology is fucking a nightmare, they're going to kill us!
Herbert: I'm gone bitch!
Esther: Herbert, I just joined Scientology!
Herbert: Great!
Present Day:
Esther: Herbert, it's all a lie, Scientology is fucking a nightmare, they're going to kill us!
Herbert: I'm gone bitch!
by Dr.FartScientist October 22, 2018
What's your religion?
Scientology.
Scientology.
by username already taken June 04, 2015