programmer

Someone whose computer has afflicted them with Stockholm Syndrome

Person 1: Hey, man what do you do for a living?
Person 2: Oh, I'm a programmer.
Person 1: Oh no, you need to see a therapist.
Person 2: No, it's okay; I know my computer really loves me.

by McSquidy January 25, 2022

programmer

A person paid to be a professional Googler

Oh look a professional programmer(googler)

by MooshiMooshiFrog January 29, 2022

Retired-programmer syndrome

A syndrome in which the sufferer thinks they're far superior to others in every way for the sole reason that they were once a programmer. Usually also have Real-Programmer Syndrome, usually act like vegans.

A: I was once a programmer, but have since retired. Did I tell you that I'm a retired programmer? Helloo??
B: Nobody. Gives. A. Fuck.
A: HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT I USED TO WRITE MILLIONS OF PAGES OF CODE BACK WHEN WE HAD TO WRITE NUMBERS BEFORE OUR LINES TO KEEP TRACK OF- You get it. A classic example of Retired-Programmer Syndrome.

by Steff a knee March 3, 2019

The Programmer's Curse

When learning a new language, unless your first working sample is "Hello World" you will be cursed and will struggle to use that language for anything useful.

I was learning Ruby on Rails but because I didn't start with a "Hello World" example, I've been struggling with it from Day One.

Bob: "Hey, Jim. I can't seem to understand why my Ruby on Rails project just won't work."
Jim: "Did you start with a basic "Hello World" example to show you understand the basics?"
Bob: "Heck no! Why would I waste my time."
Jim: <smh> "Well, good luck, Jim. You've cursed yourself with The Programmer's Curse.

by h4rper August 28, 2019

_King_ (programmer)

Pretty much your overall superior, this sexy Norwegian knows C# to a new level and could make pretty much any software if you asked him to. How would you know he's a C# god? he doesn't use foreach.
_King_ would be the least person you'd expect to skid code.

Hey dude, did you see _King_'s new program?
Yea, it's absolutely fire, i love Visual Source Designer!
_King_ (programmer)

by Guy King December 3, 2019

Programming the ENIAC

Used to describe a particularly daunting and tedious task, but usually one with very good outcomes. Originates as a reference to the programming of the first computer, the ENIAC (Electronic Numerical Integrator And Computer), which would take hours to program simple math functions. Programming was done with a series of switches and in binary (1s and 0s).

"Passing Ms. Smith's English class is like programming the ENIAC."

by Frank The Box Monster November 12, 2013

proogrammer

A computer programmer or software developer with an elitist, know-it-all attitude. Typically, a proogrammer will come up with the most complicated and impractical solution to a problem (always OOP), merely to demonstrate their superior coding prowess.

"So, Jim, did you complete the simple one-button contact form I asked you to make?"
"Um, of course. I built out the data retrieval class, which extends the base form object class, which implements my custom built button class, and I'm finishing up the second layer of abstraction as we speak."
"Damn proogrammers...."

by michaelhejja October 20, 2008