Shoot rainbows out of my ass 

Extreme happiness beyond comprehension.

I'd like to meet new people (in person) and increase my social circles. If something clicks I'd like to get to know that person better in the name of dating. Eventually find eternal happiness and shoot rainbows out of my ass as I ride around on my unicorn for the rest of my life.

Shoot rainbows out of my ass by Doc Molly February 26, 2015

You can scan my ass! 

An increasingly common retort from customers checking out at Whole Foods Market as the cashier asks you if you have the Amazon Prime app to rescue some of your remaining paycheck.

I was with my friend Sean at Whole Payckeck when he rudely blurted out, “You can scan my ass!” which later seemed totally understandable when I saw the $150. receipt for his single bag of groceries.

You can scan my ass! by Dr Bunnygirl November 18, 2019

SHIT IN MY ASS 

A harsh alternative to POOP IN MY BUTT. Used only in the direst, most pressing of predicaments.

-Dude. Last night you got so drunk you made out with your sister and everyone took video of it and now it's all over the internet.
-SHIT IN MY ASS

SHIT IN MY ASS by mirmironthewall November 28, 2009

chaps my ass

An expression used to indicate strong annoyance at someone or something, a stonger expression than "frosts my balls."

Getting served stale sweet tea really fucking chaps my ass.

chaps my ass by harry flashman July 23, 2003

Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my ass!

Attempting a task that has been dumped on you by somebody who expects a miracle. Like your dumbass boss who left two hours ago and wants you to get something done in an hour that would have taken him all day to finish. A takeoff on "Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat!" from the Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoons.

'The boss expects me to get all these reports done for the corporate office by tomorrow morning, I don't think I'm gonna make it.' 'Well, you know how Steve is about that. He bails and now you have to say "Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my ass!" just like the other days of the week where he is working 27/4'

--OR--

Rick left early again, now I gotta pull a rabbit out of my ass to get this computer fixed.

Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my ass! by Silverlock March 30, 2009

eat my ass 

An insult. Bastardization of 'eat me' and 'kiss my ass'.

I told the fucker to go get a spoon and eat my ass.

eat my ass by gomer May 6, 2003

riding my ass 

To be overly critical of. To continuously find fault with.

I was late for work and my boss was riding my ass the whole day.

riding my ass by AL Diego May 13, 2007