Keyboard Politician 

Someone who thinks they know everything about politics and usually butts in whenever there's a political discussion brought up online, you'll find these scum on forums such as Reddit, 4chan, & on other social media such as Instagram, Facebook & Youtube.

Rob: I think Reasonable Doubt is one of the greatest albums ever that talks about the ghetto
Josh: White people caused the ghetto in the 1st place
Rob: Why the fuck are you bringing this shit up

Josh: Because what the government did was terrible
Rob: You don't even know this shit you keyboard politician

Keyboard Politician by SkkkrtSkrt July 3, 2017

Keyhole squish 

A key is inserted into the mans cock hole and twisted as if unlocking a door. The inner penile tissue should tear and can be sucked out using a woman’s lips.

That guys dick is fucked, I heard Sandra gave him a keyhole squish

Keyhole squish by Swaggy longbottom September 21, 2017

keyword-ese 

The term refers to people who search stuff only in keywords, and not in full sentences.

An example of how a person using keyword-ese would look something like this: Mole butt cancer
Whilst a person who googles in full sentences would do it like this: can the mole on my butt be a sign of cancer?

Guy: Why’s your search history so weird?
Girl: Oh I search in keyword-ese.
Guy: No, not that. I was referring to the midget porn.

keyword-ese by Åh nå October 27, 2019

Keynis 

The Keynis is simply the combination of a Key and a penis. Typically the Keynis is illustrated by a black silhouetted penis and a bent tip. Not to by confused by a normal penis with a straight shaft.

Yo I heard Jessica said that you have a Keynis, what’s up with that?

Keynis by Doomith Slayer October 7, 2022

Alicia Keys 

most beautiful soul/ r&b singer, doesn't have to wear a bikini on stage to get fans.from the streets of new york.an upcoming legend who will never be forgotten!!!!

me:ooh she's pretty
girl:can she sing
me:yeah
girl:oh she's an alicia keys?

Alicia Keys by SierRa&couTanae September 14, 2003

Cold keyboard 

Ignoring someone via the internet; giving a virtual cold shoulder. Giving someone the cold keyboard may be due to:
- Annoyance with said person, caused by either a genuine problem or something utterly fucking stupid, like trolling.
- Having gotten pwned and having no possibility of coming back, giving the cold keyboardee immense satisfaction.
Et cetera.

When Johnny didn't understand that Betty's monosyllabic responses to his IMs meant she didn't feel like talking, she resorted to giving him the cold keyboard.

Sally gave me the cold keyboard after I kicked her in the ass arguing logic on facebook. There is no sweeter satisfaction.

Cold keyboard by KasiaR August 18, 2010

Jingly Keys 

1. A pleasing visual and acoustic distraction.
2. Therefore, metaphorically, an answer that tries to draw attention away from a difficult probing question, as if jingling some keys, especially when employed by a simple person who assumes that the questioner will be easily distracted.

1. I love the sound of jingly keys.
2. "You said last month that all Muslims should be banned from the US? Then you said you thought a Muslim was one of our finest citizens. Now you're saying the ban was a good idea again. Is this entirely consistent?"

"This is typical of people who hate America. We need strong leadership, Obama should resign."
"Nice try with the jingly keys sir, but I'd like an answer."

Jingly Keys by Zamzara June 13, 2016