Like masturbation, only dirtier. Mainly performed by: 1) Men of any age fantasizing about having sex (usually) with someone famous or someone who wouldn't have real sex with them in a million years. 2) What your mother does to men to feed her drug habbit. 3) A perfectly normal act ensuring your mother has to look at weird stains on your underwear and sheets. 4) An act usually performed whilst lying on a single bed with your eyes tight shut. 5) Something you do when bored. 6) An act that makes you believe you're the best lover in the world....or you will be when you start having sex for real. 7) Something that old guy down the road made you do to him for a bag of sweets. 8) Something every male does, but no-one admits to it. 9) An act that usually ends with the participant saying, "YES!" or "EWWW!" depending on the angle of the penis. 10) What you're doing right now as you read these definitions of wanking...
"I refute all allegations that I was out of order. Wanking at a funeral is perfectly normal"
"Sorry for waking you up mummy, but I've discovered this new thing called 'wanking' and I wanted to show you what happens at the end. Shall I get you a tissue?"
"Sorry for waking you up mummy, but I've discovered this new thing called 'wanking' and I wanted to show you what happens at the end. Shall I get you a tissue?"
by Doctor Phew August 17, 2011
Get the Wanking mug.is a town 15 minutes north of New Haven. It is a very white town, with about 10 black people who have trickled in from Hamden or Meriden by accident, and the rest are Mexicans that work in the restaurants as cooks or the local Laundrymat Chain "White Way" (ironically named). Wally World as it is affectionately known as, has access to all the major roadways in CT, just like Meriden, however Meriden is a sh*thole, so most people that have jobs and ambition live in Wallingford. Most people that are born in this town tend to stay there forever working at Ulbrich, Amphenol, or a number of other larger companies in the Industrial Parks. There are plenty of decent places to eat for fine dining,some great bars, and ofcourse, some of the finest dives in the universe....headlined by "The Monte Carlo"...where you can get the finest canned beer money can buy. There is every chain restaurant possible, Including CT's only Sonic, so you will have plenty of choices to hit up when you get the muchies on your "bake ride" around town. Wallingford people have a lot of pride in their town,like to get into everyone else's drama, and are definitely not afraid to fight for no apparent reason. Summers are filled with the "ping" of plastic hitting aluminum over at the softball fields Westside and Doolittle where there is more beer being drunk than actual softball being played. All in all, wallingford is a great town to raise a family.
Meriden Kid "yo, whiteboy, you from Wallingford?"
Wallingford Kid "I am white, so yes I am."
Meriden Kid "I guess you are right."
Wallingford guy at a bar "Jaegerbomb and a budweiser"
Wallingford girl at a bar "tootsie roll and a white zinfadel"
Black guy in Wallingford "what the hell am I doing in Wallingford?"
Wallingford Kid "I am white, so yes I am."
Meriden Kid "I guess you are right."
Wallingford guy at a bar "Jaegerbomb and a budweiser"
Wallingford girl at a bar "tootsie roll and a white zinfadel"
Black guy in Wallingford "what the hell am I doing in Wallingford?"
by fatkid3 September 25, 2010
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We all started wanking like peter on the dole when we saw the bottle of midleton.
it was like john just grew a badonkadonk.
it was like john just grew a badonkadonk.
by elburno March 8, 2008
Get the wanking like peter on the dole mug.The act or the art of jerking off but the word sounds cool so I can just say I'm wanking instead of saying I'm jerking off
by Ligmafatnuts October 6, 2020
Get the Wanking mug.by carrm April 21, 2009
Get the walling mug.Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.
I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.
SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
by Catamount June 21, 2008
Get the SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi mug.Similar to sleep paralysis. One is woken from sleep unable to move, with an overwhelming sense of fear and dread, resulting from hallucinations and paranoia.
by Counting Silence June 1, 2016
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