Turd burglar

Its an ol done more that is kind of like the story of Jack frost except its A sneaky lil midget bandit theif in the night that climbs in your bathroom window and burgles the turd right out the bowl that more than likely are there because you got shit faced and forgot to flush or your dirty lazy kids left the bowl present for the turd bandit. Because the story goes.... Feed the turd burglar once a week and you will never get a stomach. Keep that gut flora happy ... Feed the turd burglars.
"Tiny tim dont flush that shit you know you got to leave that for the turd burglar tonight or you will end up with a belly ache
by Ghostbuster2000 February 08, 2021
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Turd burglar

A person you do not particularly like who you have a suspicion burgles turds
Oi Dolan
Ye

Dude ur a turd burglar
Gooby pleaz
by Buttorange101 February 24, 2018
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Turd burglar

One that sneaks into bathrooms and harvests an unflushed piece of human feces for later consumption.
Your uncle can’t pick you up from school he isn’t allowed within 100 feet of the school because he’s a turd burglar.
by Cumsack198 May 04, 2022
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turd wannabes

Loosely held together feces that is too solid to be considered diarrhea yet too divided and "small-chunkish" to be considered a turd. These inferior poop chunks are notoriously known for the pain and uncomfortable feeling they give. Since they consist mainly of water and generally have low-poo density (see Type 5 and 6 on the Bristol Stool Scale) these "fluffy pieces with ragged edges" will definitely sour the remainder of the day. Being in relationships to alcohol, these chunks almost always making an appearance during a DADS. Worse yet, they are forever jealous of the their more popular turd brethren. They are turd wannabes.
My DADS this morning was awful; it consisted mostly of water, pizza, and turd wannabes.
by Idontfunkwithyou March 13, 2015
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Tweety turd

Omg there's a tweety turd on my jumper!
by Mandermen. March 08, 2009
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morning turd

the kind of person who likes to wake up in the morning to get things done, but rather lays in bed entertaining harrowing and negative thoughts like whether their parents love them in a sort of cynical, half-hazed slumber
wow i should really wake up and make some coffee, i'm being a morning turd
by The-real-cobra-queen September 05, 2019
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Squirrelling The Turd

The act of holding in a bowel movement until a later time. As a squirrel hides nuts for a later time.
by Pete1688 October 07, 2012
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