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Procrasturbation

To occupy oneself with masturbation while pressing matters await.
Verb: 1) "I was procrasturbating this evening and therefore late for dinner"

2) "Suzy, why arent you here yet...procraturbating again?"

3) "I need to get going maybe just one last procrasturbation"
by bhall998 June 25, 2014
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Procrasturbation

The act of chucking a wank in order to avoid doing work or study
Procrasturbation Example:

Dude 1: "Fuck dude, I haven't done any work all day!"
Dude 2: "Yeah me neither, I've been procrasturbating"
Dude 1: "Wtf is that?"
Dude 2: "It's when you masturbate to procrastinate"
by LFCAidan September 14, 2014
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Procrasturbation

Putting off masturbating for a later time, when it should be done now.
That man Joey teaches procrasturbation at school.
by Mustangboi May 4, 2018
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procrasturbate

Putting off a task or chore in order to masturbate
John likes to procrasturbate because he has a sex addiction.
by CrayCrayJ January 11, 2022
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Cybernetic Procrasturbation

Willful and enjoyable procrastination that is predominantly performed through the use of internet-based sources of distraction. Basically, anything electronic that holds your attention from completing necessary tasks.
i.e. social media, Reddit, shopping, and gaming (vidya).
"I wasted four hours on cybernetic procrasturbation today and now I can't finish this report for my boss on time!"

"Zach is the worst at handing in papers on time because he is always cybernetically procrasturbating."
by Noodl3Ninja October 23, 2020
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Sargasmic Procrasturbation

When you masturbate while you procrastinate in a sarcastic manner until you orgasm.
Guy 1: Hey, did you finish the project?

Guy 2: Hell yeah I did! I've been working on my sargasmic procrasturbation all night!

Guy 1: So you didn't really finish it, did you?

Guy 2: Nope, I haven't even started.
by Muff Garbage October 21, 2010
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procrasturbate

to beat the meat nonstop over a specific interval of time, pause for a short while, then continue jerking violently, repeating the process as desired; although frequently time consuming, the on-off duty of manning the post often terminates in a forceful and messy yet satiating and pleasant explosion.
I usually follow the 5-minute on, 5-minute off rule for about an hour during my procrasturbation session, at the end of which I acquire the power of vertically projectile cumshots.

My girlfriend likes to help me procrasturbate after class. After about 45 minutes of this technique, I can always makes her flinch when I blow my rocks' load on her face, or even her chest!
by theking07 January 21, 2010
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